


He's Not Crying for Himself

by TheRealAndian



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Body Horror, Bonding, But Not Much, Cap trying to stop Tony from doing bad things, Character Death, Depression, Friendship, Gen, Hallucinations, Heart Attacks, Irondad, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Possession, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Post-Infinity War, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Precious Peter Parker, Revenge, Save them, Self-Hatred, Sort Of, Spoilers, Suicidal Thoughts, Thanos must die, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Daddy Issues, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs Sleep, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Working Out My Feelings Through Fic, at this point these tags are a jumbled mess, canon ships only, please, save my sons, soul world theory, the culmination of years of anxiety and depression, too many characters get help
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-05-23 14:33:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 19
Words: 23,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14936129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealAndian/pseuds/TheRealAndian
Summary: After the events of Infinity War, everyone would do well with counseling and therapy, but none so much as Tony Stark. Unfortunately, half the universe is gone, which means half the therapists are gone, which means Tony will have to figure himself out on his own. And also plot revenge.Serious, serious revenge.A.K.A: Tony wants revenge on Thanos for killing his kid and dammit, he's gonna get it.





	1. End

He should’ve known. Dammit, he should’ve _known_!The moment the words left his lips: ”You're alright.” Ha. No he wasn't. Even if he'd stayed, he wouldn't have been the same—just a broken version of his old self, haunted by his own failures

Huh. That sounded familiar. Like the start of a joke with no punchline.

Just like him.

A joke.

He stared down at what was left of the boy: ashes swept away from the windblown earth, tumbling far, far away. Away from where the kid had been. Away from where he crouched, tears streaking his bloodied face.

Just…

Gone.

Numbness crept into his body. Maybe he would fade too?

“We have to go.”

A voice? He didn’t even bother to look at the speaker. He had failed. The kid was dead.

It was on him.

 

_I don’t wanna go! Stark, please, I don’t wanna go! I don’t wanna go!_

The voice echoed, screaming and begging for help—for him to do something. But all he could do was watch the scene replay over and over and over.

_I’m sorry._

 

He stood, letting the stranger drag him away. The boy shouldn’t have needed to be sorry. He was a kid. He should’ve been worrying about field trips and homework and finding someone to date. He shouldn’t have been out on the streets every night, watching for criminals. He shouldn’t have been jumping onto spaceships and trying to save the day. He shouldn’t have been trying to emulate _him_ of all people.

Another silent tear dripped from his eye. He couldn’t even be mad at Quill for trying to beat the shit out of the monster. Quill had lost his girl. Maybe he had, too. He didn’t know.

He didn’t _want_ to know.

He didn’t want to know anything.

He just wanted to die.

Die, like in all the nightmares he’d been having. Die, like he’d been trying so hard not to for the past decade. Die, like he deserved.

 

But the shadow of the kid’s eyes bored into him. Would he blame him? Would he hate him? Would he even want to come back at all, after his hero had failed him so badly?

He didn’t want to know.

He just wanted the nightmare to be over.


	2. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ride back to Earth sure is quiet...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's amazing how many hits this got so fast! I figured I'd post a new part as soon as I finished the one I was on. And I finished Part 5 today, so here's Part 2.  
> That makes sense, right?

The only sound on the ride back to Earth was the thrum of the engine. The blue alien woman had taken over Quill’s ship and left him alone.

So alone.

But he had to be strong. He had to do it for the kid. He _had_ to.

But could he do it?

Who was he kidding. He was just a big man in a suit. Take that away, and he was a broken waste of oxygen.

He’d once told the kid that if he was nothing without the suit, then he shouldn’t have it. But he knew he wasn’t anything without his own. It’s hard to be a hero with just brains. Especially when those brains can’t save the things that matter.

 

“We’re approaching Terra,” the woman said. “Strap in.”

He crumbled back into a seat and forced himself to put on the seatbelt. He did his best not to think about who would've normally occupied that seat.

Planet Earth loomed before them, the familiar landmasses filling him with dread. What was the world like, with half its population having vanished? Who of the Avengers were left?

What would he tell the kid's aunt?

He shuddered. She might not even be alive anymore, but still…

He didn’t want to hurt anyone else. Not like he already had. This was his fault. It always came back to his stupid, arrogant, asshole self.

Reentry flames licked at the ship’s exterior, forming a beautiful painting of death. “Hopefully your planet doesn't try to shoot us down,” the alien woman hissed, her black eyes glaring at the closer-rushing surface.

He didn't say anything.

 

“Incoming craft,” a crisp female voice buzzed over the intercom, “identify yourself or risk destruction.”

The blue woman groaned. "I thought this planet was supposed to be stuck in the dark ages.”

“Identify yourself.”

“This is starship _Milano_. I picked up a Terran on Titan and figured I'd bring him back.”

Whispers traded on the other end before a piercing squeal rang through the ship. “Quill!?” a gruff voice shouted. “Quill I swear to God if that's you—”

“Quill’s dead, Rocket,” the woman sighed.

The voice from the other side let out a muffled groan. “Shit. Nebula. Well…tell me you have _some_ good news.”

“Everyone's dead, Rocket.”

Silence followed. The flames outside grew brighter. Maybe they'd be blasted out of the sky, finally put out of their misery.

Another voice came over the com, one that was much more familiar. It turned his stomach into knots. Could he do this? “Starship _Milano_ , proceed to these coordinates. Do not change course.” The man added quietly, “Enough people have died today.”

The coordinates appeared on-screen. The blue lady, Nebula, set them in and leaned back, watching the ground loom closer. Maybe they would crash into it and end their suffering.

But probably not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder who that voice could've been?
> 
> More to come soon! I'm trying to keep a 3-part lead on myself but gAHHH I just want to post this. I haven't written fanfic in a while, and it's nice to write something recreational again.  
> Feedback is always appreciated!


	3. Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've made it to Earth, but no one is handling things well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a very difficult time not naming this part 'Point Break'  
> But Thor's not even in this part, sooooo...  
> Rip
> 
> Also, trying to give all these parts a one-word name  
> Seems to be working so far  
> -ish

The landing was smooth, much to his disappointment, but he was completely content with sitting there and wasting away. Nebula had to practically drag him out of his seat, down the ramp, out to the palace. Intimidating bald women with gorgeous brown skin tones escorted them inside. Their leader, plated in gold, had marks on her cheeks.

So she’d been crying too.

In fact, upon closer inspection, they all looked exhausted, both physically and emotionally. Tear streaks were common.

But what did he care? He knew he was to blame. He shouldn’t have tried to stop Quill; he should’ve stayed and helped the kid get the thing away.

Oh God, the kid.

The mere thought of those eyes staring up at him, terror seizing those last breaths. _I’m sorry._

He stumbled. He stumbled _hard_ , collapsing on the ground in a mess of disgust and hatred and _pain._ God, the _pain._  Why did it have to _hurt_ so much? Like his own heart was trying to wrench itself from his body and run off. Like he was losing his grip on reality and simultaneously crashing into it headfirst.

Tears leapt into his eyes. He just wanted to die. Why couldn’t _he_ have faded? Why did he have to fail the _one person_ who’d looked up to him from the beginning? Who’d _trusted him_? Who, despite having never done a _damn thing_ wrong, _apologized_ for failing?

Just.

 _Why_?

“Tony?”

That voice. Why did it elicit such a strange reaction? Hatred filled with hope? That didn’t make any sense. But then why…?

Hands clamped down on his shoulders. “Tony,” the voice repeated, softer. Gentle. “Stay with me, Tony. We need you.”

He blinked through the tears. A man stared back at him, concern flickering in his hollow blue gaze. He knew this man. This man was the reason he’d found the kid. Why he and the kid had even met.

He’d recruited the kid to fight this man. To stop _this man._

If it hadn’t been for _this man_ , the kid never would’ve gotten on that spaceship.

He lunged for the man, ignoring the surprised cries of the women around him. He needed this man to feel _exactly_ how much it _hurt_. A look of shock spread across the man’s face, but the tears and the rage blinded him too much for him to notice. He just needed to get rid of this man. The mere thought that this man had survived and the kid hadn’t was enough to make him scream. Incoherent howls ripped through his vocal cords. This man needed to die. He needed to die he needed to die he needed to die—

But...

Why?

It was _his_ fault the kid had died, not this man’s. This man who was prying cold, numb fingers from his throat. It was _his_ fault that this man had gone into hiding after their fight—the fight where _he’d_ recruited the kid. It was _his_ fault the city was destroyed. His creation caused it, but _he_ did it. And—

God, he was the worst, wasn’t he?

The world spun. He needed a drink. Or twenty. Forget about this whole thing. Drink to oblivion until nothing mattered. Because nothing mattered anyway.

He just wanted to die.

He wanted to leave this horrible world behind and forget about all his many, _many_ failures. He wanted to stop pretending. He wanted to go back, undo his entire life. He wanted to never have existed.

He just wanted to die.

“Tony,” the man said, his voice slightly more hoarse, “we’re going to figure this out, okay? Don’t lose hope.”

His throat bobbed. “Hope?” he scoffed. It felt like he hadn’t spoken in weeks. And why did his voice grate so horribly against his ears? He was more of a mess than he’d thought.

Nebula sneered. “That’s the first thing he’s said since it happened.”

The man pulled his eyes away for a moment, staring up at her with his brows knitted together as tightly as the beard he now sported. “That’s what I’m worried about.”

Worried? About him? It was almost enough for him to crack a smile, maybe even laugh. But it’d take more than that. A failure like him always hid behind humor. Now even _that_ was too good for him.

“Talk to me, Stark,” the man said. “I know you can.”

A voice squeaked somewhere off to the right. “Oh God, is that Tony?”

The man’s gaze didn’t waver. “Tony, we all lost someone today. You’re not alone.” When he didn’t respond, the man let out a defeated sigh. “Look, I know the last time we saw each other ended badly. I know you don’t like me, but we need you. All of us.”

A smaller man with ruffled hair and a mousey face popped into view, his fear and concern obvious despite the wall of tears. “Oh man, Tony, you look awful. Where were you?”

“Don’t grill him, Bruce,” the first man said. “He needs time.”

“We don’t really _have_ time, Cap.”

Cap? Captain? Oh right. Captain Rogers. Steve. That was right. How did he forget? And Bruce. Bruce Banner. Fellow scientist who could turn into an enormous green rage monster. He’d disappeared after the city fell. The city of Novi Grad. Sokovia.

And he was Tony. Tony Stark. Genius, billionaire, former playboy, philanthropist.

Failure.

He groaned. He didn’t want to be out of the haze he’d been in since watching the kid…

And yet, there was no stopping him. It was like someone had rebooted him, and the hazy sense of distance was just him updating. New surroundings, new circumstances.

New Tony Stark.

Furious Tony Stark.

Thanos was going to pay. Tony was going to make it _hurt_. He was going to make him regret ever _thinking_ of what he’d caused.

And he was going to enjoy every second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony remembers who he is, and dammit, he's going to avenge his not-son!  
> Happy Father's Day!
> 
> I wasn't intending to post again so soon, but I powered through Part 6 like crazy and am about a third of the way through Part 7 so...  
> Why not? It's Father's Day, and Tony is the best dad...sort of...despite...well, y'know...  
> Yeah.  
>  _ **Update:** Part 7 is done and I apologize in advance._
> 
> Anyway, hope you're all having a wonderful day, even if this isn't the most exciting or uplifting holiday for you. I can barely believe this fic has over 400 views after only 2 days! That's crazy for me!  
> Thank you all for being wonderful!


	4. Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is 100% perfectly fine.

“Well I’m not dead, so that’s pretty great if you ask me,” the disembodied voice said. “Seriously, this is one of the coolest things that’s ever happened to me. Imagine all the things I could _research here_!”

The gold-plated bald woman, Okoye, sighed. “Please, Shuri, we need you to focus.”

“But it’s _so cool_!”

Steve shook his head. “Shuri, this is the farthest thing from ‘cool’. We need you here.”

“Okay, fine, fine. I’m working on it. It isn’t easy to upload your entire consciousness to a computer, you know.”

Tony leaned back in his seat, ignoring the conversation. He had more important things to think about. Like what Shuri’s being alive meant.

She, along with half the universe, had faded into ash. Thanos had killed them all. And yet...somehow, they were talking to her. So that meant...they weren’t dead?

He could save the kid?

How?

Well, first, he had to figure out where the kid was. Had to pull him out of whatever dimension Thanos had sent him. Just had to find that dimension first.

And kill Thanos.

Oh, he was going to tear him to _shreds_ the moment he saw him again.

But first, he needed a new suit. A better one. One that could withstand Thanos.

Steve must’ve sensed the hatred boiling out of Tony. The man glanced over at him, worry creasing his face. But Steve didn’t need to worry about him. He just needed to focus on the task at hand. After all, that’s what he was good at. Tony felt fine. Never better.

Especially after finding out his fiancée had survived The Snap.

Of course, she was killed in a car crash immediately following it.

God, he needed a drink.

“Tony? You holding up alright?”

Dammit, how many times would he have to answer that question? Why wouldn’t Steve leave him alone? “I’m fine, dear.”

Steve didn’t look convinced. He opened his mouth to say something else—probably lecture about how everything was going to be fine and the whole ‘we’re gonna get through this’ shit—but the computer beeped a couple of times, pulling his attention back to Shuri.

“Mental download complete,” the computer chimed. “Preparing temporary body.”

Any other time, Tony would’ve been all over this, trying to reverse engineer the science behind this, trying to change it more to his style.

Not today.

He was too busy planning for that.

Sand rustled behind them. Vibranium sand, because apparently vibranium can do anything. It slowly formed into the shape of a body—a young woman. The color altered to reveal Shuri. Sand Shuri.

Okay, so this was actually pretty cool.

But there were more important things to worry about.

“Hello, everyone,” Shuri grinned. “Good to see you all.”

Steve nodded. “Likewise.”

Queen Ramonda, who’d been slouching dazed in her seat, finally rose up, her sorrowed face brightening at the sight of her daughter. “I knew you were not gone, daughter.”

Shuri’s smile grew. “Of course not, Mother. You didn’t think I’d leave myself so vulnerable, did you?”

Tony’s mood soured. He’d left the kid vulnerable. Himself, too, but how could he have risked the kid? But Shuri was here, speaking, moving, _breathing_. He needed to know more.

“So,” he said, leaning forward. “Where exactly are you?”

She blinked, nose twitching. She must’ve been surprised he’d said anything at all. “Mentally, I’m here. Physically, though...that’s a bit more complicated.”

Tony rose from his chair, unconsciously rubbing his left wrist. Damn, that thing always hurt nowadays. Not as much as the injuries he’d sustained battling Thanos, but at least those were gone now, thanks to Wakandan medical technology. The pain in his arm _never_ went away. “That’s also what I meant.”

“I thought so.” She glanced at Steve before meeting Tony’s eyes, both sharing the same worried expression. “As far as I can tell, it’s another dimension entirely. But how to actually _leave_ it, I have no idea.”

Steve cleared his throat. “Have you...seen anyone else?”

She shook her head. “I haven’t. Though I’m sure I will with some more exploration. I mean, half of the universe was sent here. How hard could it be?”

The Queen Mother crossed her arms, her traditional robes swaying. “Shuri, you have no way of communicating with other races with unknown languages. How do you intend—”

“Not true, Mother. I salvaged some tech from alien crash sites, remember? And Chitauri tech as well. I managed to devise a partial pangalactic translator from their data.” The girl shrugged. “Sure, I don’t have all the languages in the universe, but I at least have some to get by with.”

Even Tony had to admit that was genius, but he wasn’t really focusing on that. How big was this planet/dimension/whatever that Shuri hadn’t seen a _single_ other being? Just the idea of how massive this place must be made his head hurt. How was he supposed to find the kid in a place that big?

No, going there wouldn’t be efficient. He needed to find a way to remove all the people trapped in that dimension and send them back home. Would it save everyone? No, but at least he could save _someone_. _The kid_.

But Pepper.

God, why Pepper?

A hand on his shoulder jolted him from his thoughts. Steve’s eyes bored into him. “Stay with us, Tony,” he said.

Tony slapped the hand away, ignoring the pain in his left wrist. “I’m _fine_.”

Steve didn’t blink. “We both know you’re not. Everyone in this _palace_ knows you’re not. But we _need_ you to keep it together.”

Once again, he had to fight the urge to strangle the man. “You don’t _need_ me at all.”

Ugh. Why did his voice have to sound like that—like the groan of a broken engine? And why couldn’t Steve just leave him alone? He’d done just fine at it the past two years or so. So why care now? Why _bother_ now?

The other man glanced at the two royal women watching them in slight shock and fear. “Excuse us, ladies,” he said, grabbing Tony’s shoulder and practically dragging him out of the lab. Up the stairs, out the door, into the hall.

“Talk,” the man ordered. “What the hell happened on Titan?”

Tony leveled his chin and glared at the man. Who did he think he was, ordering him around? Demanding he tell what happened? What he failed to do? “Wow, Steve. Language.”

Disgust spread across the man’s face. Good. Just what he wanted. Right? “Are you serious?”

“I’m very serious.”

Steve groaned. “I can’t tell if it’s a good thing or a bad thing that you’re acting like this.”

Tony shrugged. “Are we done now?”

“What, got a hot date?”

Oh. Oh _shit_. He did _not_ just go there. Not with Pepper gone. _Not with Pepper gone_. Propelled by rage, his hands wrapped around Steve’s throat again, pressing fingers into the same bruises he made earlier. God, he was going to _kill_ this man. Damn the consequences.

They sank to the floor, Steve struggling beneath him, trying to throw him off. But Tony clutched tight, as if killing the other man would somehow fix all the other problems. As if Steve’s death would bring back Pepper. Bring back the kid. He didn’t care if it killed him, too. He just wanted the two most important people in his life back. Alive. He _needed them_. And he’d never realized just how much. How much they’d helped him. Hell, even _Happy_ never turned his back on him. He’d faded, too.

But Steve.

Steve Rogers _betrayed_ him. His father had spoken _wonders_ of the man, but _this_ was what he was: a traitor. Dammit, why had he ever wanted to _be_ like this man? Just so his father would love him? Why would his father have ever cared about this man? And why did this man keep pretending to care about _him_?

Hands grabbed at him, tried to pull him off the man. But he held fast. Steve was going to pay. And then Thanos. But first, Steve. Steve, who was turning as blue as the armor he’d once proudly sported. He glared into the man’s pale, fearful eyes, hating everything about him. The new beard, the voice, the _morality_. The fact that his father had cared more about him than his own son.

A burst of pain lanced down his side, tingling through every nerve. Tony lost his grip on Steve, who scrambled away hacking and spluttering. Meanwhile, Tony collapsed on the ground, muscles convulsing. Another man loomed over him, lightning crackling in his gaze. “Tony Stark,” his voice boomed. “Forgive me of this, my friend.” He pointed a strange, axe-like weapon at him.

The last thing Tony saw was a bolt of lightning splintering into him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, Thor. And trying to kill Steve again.  
> And also Pepper.  
> Pepper didn't deserve this.


	5. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some quality anger management therapy with the best.
> 
> Also, just a warning that there's a brief struggle with suicidal thoughts. It's in the tags, but this is the chapter it happens in.

“We’re lucky you didn’t kill him.”

“I think _you’re_ lucky he didn’t kill _you_ , Captain Rogers.”

“Gotta side with the big man, Stars ‘n’ Stripes. Dude would’ve killed you.”

“Thank you, Rabbit.”

“I’m not a—! Stop petting me!”

Tony blinked awake. The bickering voices outside the door continued, but he ignored them. Instead, he looked down at his hands. He’d tried to strangle Steve. Twice. With those two hands.

Why did this nightmare have to keep going?

Steve wasn’t his enemy. He was _never_ the enemy. He was just ignorant. He didn’t know what happened on Titan. What’d happened to Pepper. What’d happened to the kid.

Did he even remember the kid?

Bah, what did it matter now?

The kid was gone, Pepper was gone, and Tony’s sanity was up for questioning. And yet, the shitstorm just never seemed to end.

Surely there was some liquor somewhere in the palace, right? He needed it. Now.

“Oh. You’re awake.”

It never stopped, did it?

Bruce stood awkwardly, bouncing back and forth. “Just. I-ignore them, yeah?”

Tony pulled the pillow out from behind his head, covered his face with it, and screamed into the fabric. Why was he like this? Why did he keep making more of a mess? Why couldn’t he just be normal?

Why couldn’t he have died instead?

Bruce wisely didn’t say anything, but he put a comforting hand on his arm. Not a forceful grounding like Steve, but a thin connection to reality. That’s what he needed. He didn’t want to face reality just yet. He wanted to hide as long as he could, try to convince everyone that he was fine, that they could all get through this. That _he_ could get through this.

But he wasn’t strong enough, and he knew it. He was completely and utterly broken at the seams. Not even the Reality Stone could fix the mess called Tony Stark, he was sure of it.

Only death.

Surely there was something that could kill him in here, right?

But...did he really want that?

The arguing outside stopped. Tony heard the door slide open. Bruce leapt into action. “No! Nope! All of you! Out! Now!” It was half-impressive that Bruce hadn’t panicked yet and turned into the Hulk.

Hmm. The Hulk could beat the shit out of him. Complete destruction. No more Tony.

But again, did he really want that?

“My apologies, Stark!” a voice called as Bruce scrambled to shut the door. “My lightning is quite shocking!”

Damn thunder god. Puns? Now?

When death seemed the best option?

No. Dammit, no. Death was _not_ the best option! It was _an_ option! An option Tony _refused_ to take! Death was the easy way out that left him no chance to get back at Thanos. No chance to save the kid. And dammit, he was going to save the kid.

Even if it killed him.

Tony threw the pillow off, startling poor Bruce. “Brucey dear, do me a favor and keep anything dangerous away from me, yeah?”

He wrung his hands, jumping again as the door finally clicked. Seriously, how had he not Hulked out yet? “Wh-what? How am I supposed to—”

“You’re a genius, right? You’ll figure it out.” Tony rubbed his arm, observing his surroundings. Even he had to admit, Wakanda was pretty sleek. But he still managed to pick out a few things that would be dangerous to himself and others if he lost his mind again.

And that was the _last_ thing he needed.

“Tony, I-I don’t know what you want me to do. I—”

“I _want you_ —!” He stopped. He shouldn’t yell. “I want you to… How do you do it?”

Bruce’s mouth opened, but words didn’t come out. He waved his hands around, trying to get across the point that wouldn’t come out.

Tony rose from the medical bed and took a couple steps toward him. “How do you...stay calm? Relax? Not Hulk out or whatever?”

The other man stopped flailing and steeped his hands in front of him, deep in thought. “I can work with that,” he muttered. His hands dropped to his sides and he stepped toward Tony. “First rule, breathe.” He urged Tony on. Inhale, exhale. Deep breaths. “Second rule, remember there’s always a solution. You’re _Tony Stark_ for crying out loud! If anyone can figure out our next move, it’s you.”

Tony bit his lip. Hell yeah he could figure it out. He just needed to stop trying to kill Steve. And stay calm. Very calm.

“Third rule,” Bruce continued, taking another step forward, “remember you’re not the only person in the world. It’s not always about you, it’s about others, too. But that doesn’t mean you have to face everything alone.”

Yeah. Others. He had to be strong. For Pepper. For the kid. For them. He had to pull it together. Be a hero. Be an Avenger.

Bruce set his hands on Tony’s shoulders. “You good?” he whispered.

Tony snorted. “No. I feel like shit and everything is terrible.”

The other man smiled painfully. “Yeah. So do the rest of us.”

“But you seem to be keeping it together pretty well.”

“Yeah, well—” Bruce released Tony and slouched onto the bed, “—it’s not completely intentional.”

Tony sat down next to him. “Surprised the Other Guy hasn’t appeared yet, honestly.”

He nodded. “The Hulk? He uh...he’s being difficult.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, curiosity finally batting away the depression and anxiety. “Difficult? Still having performance issues?”

“Don’t...don’t word it that way. But yeah. He kinda just...refuses. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

“But you don’t know why?”

“I...I have a hypothesis,” Bruce admitted, fidgeting with his sleeves. “Thanos took him down like he was nothing. He’s never really...been beaten that badly before.”

“So…,” Tony said, stifling a chuckle, “the Hulk is throwing a tantrum?”

Bruce cracked a grin. “Yeah. Kinda.” His face fell. “I was so worried I would never come back if I turned into the Hulk again that I never even considered the possibility that _he_ might never come back.”

Tony messed with his wrist. Damn, it always hurt, now. “I know what you mean,” he said.

“Do you?”

“‘Course I do.” He stared down at his hands, remembering the ashes that had stained them less than 24 hours ago. “Always so worried about myself, what’s gonna happen. I push away everything that matters until it’s already too late.”

Bruce narrowed his eyes. “A-are you serious?”

“Yeah. Why—”

“Tony, that’s got to be the stupidest thing you’ve ever said.”

“I can definitely think of worse.”

“No. No, you’re not—” Bruce shot up, flailing his arms with agitation. “Tony, you’re the most selfless person I know!”

Tony laughed, the sheer absurdity of the claim catching him off guard. “Now who’s being stupid, Banner?”

“You...do you really not see it?”

Maybe not, but he definitely saw the other man turning several shades greener. “Enlighten me.”

Bruce threw his hands in the air, crying out in frustration. “God, you’re _impossible_! Tony, you flew a nuke into _space_ , for God’s sake! You supported the Accords because you didn’t want anyone else to get _hurt_! You keep making more suits to _protect_ people! And at the same time, you’re trying to keep your distance from people who care about you so they don’t see that you’re _killing yourself over things you can’t control_!”

Tony leapt up, frustration clawing at his mind. Bruce didn’t know what he was talking about. He couldn’t. He wasn’t even around for the Accords. For the fight with Steve. He didn’t know anything. He didn’t know Tony. He couldn’t. “ _I should’ve been able to stop him_!” he cried, disgusted at the tears filling his eyes. “ _This never should’ve happened_!”

Bruce whirled around, eyes blazing. He towered over Tony now, but it was still Bruce—not the Hulk. Not yet. “Anyone could be blamed for what happened, Stark!” his voice boomed, the guttural rage of the Hulk just peeking through. “We didn’t get rid of the Mind Stone when we had the chance! We tried to save Vision, and we failed! And Thor didn’t kill Thanos when he had the chance! If you wanna blame someone, blame Thor for not aiming for the head!”

He took a few breaths, calming himself until he at least stood at normal height. “Nebula told us what happened on Titan,” he murmured. “You took on Thanos by yourself, Tony. The Hulk did that, and he was down in seconds. It’s the most selfless act I’ve ever heard of; stop blaming yourself. We _all_ screwed up.”

Tony closed his eyes and took a rattling breath. “There are so many things I could’ve done differently—that I _should’ve_ done differently—that I didn’t do.”

Bruce sighed. “We _all_ regret something, Tony. We’ve _all_ failed at one point or another. But if it weren’t for our mistakes, we wouldn’t be who we are now. We wouldn’t be Avengers.” He guided Tony back to the bed, sitting down next to him again. “But we _are_ Avengers, and things’ve looked bad before. Maybe not on this scale, but we need to keep our heads, because Thanos isn’t going to go down easy.” A darkness that Tony hadn’t seen before shone in Bruce’s eyes. “And neither are we.”

Tony stared at the ground, his hands displayed in front of him. Tears dripped from his eyes. He could still feel the kid’s form crumbling beneath him. Could still hear his voice begging for help. Could still see the fear in his eyes. Then, the gentle resignation.

But there was still a chance.

If Shuri was alive, then so was Peter. God, just thinking his name hurt.

But if Peter was alive, then Tony was going to save him. Tony was going to get him back if it was the last thing he did. Because Peter deserved a chance to live. To grow up. Seventeen years old was too young.

A speaker hidden somewhere in the room rang. “Mr. Stark,” Shuri’s voice called. “There’s someone here to see you. Said something about other dimensions? Come to the Meeting Room, please.”

Tony’s heart swelled. There it was—the feeling he needed. _Hope_.

He was going to save Peter.

No matter the cost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are beginning to build up. Wonder who could be there?
> 
> And I can't be the only one who's noticed those things, right? Like, Tony's always holding himself accountable for things beyond his control, and he's always risking himself for others. He's such a complex character.  
> Also the arm thing is real. His left arm is cursed. Now that it's been pointed out to me, and can't stop noticing it.


	6. Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saving everyone isn't going to be easy, but the least they can do is make a plan.

“The dimension everyone is trapped in—I know it,” Wong said, glancing over as Tony and Bruce entered the room. Bruce stumbled over to Natasha, while Tony sat down away from everyone else. Away from Steve. His still couldn’t believe he’d tried to kill _Steve_. Guilt gnawed at his throat. Steve was his _friend_. Or at least, they _used_ to be friends. Now he wasn’t really sure _what_ they were.

Wong continued. “The Ancient One called it Soul World. It’s a sort of dimension between our reality and the Astral Plane within the Soul Stone.”

“So we need to figure out how to get everyone out of there and back into the real world,” Steve said.

Tony shook his head. “Shuri hasn’t seen a single other person yet, and we can’t communicate with most other races.”

Wong nodded. “I am only one man, and no matter how many sorcerers are on it, we won’t be able to evacuate everyone and get them back to their worlds. We simply don’t have enough power.”

Thor leapt to his feet. “With Stormbreaker, I can channel the power of the Bifrost! Surely I can send everyone back to their homes!”

Again, Tony shook his head. “We don’t have the kind of power needed to get everyone out of Soul World to begin with. And I don’t care how fancy your new axe is, there’s no way it can return half the universe to where it belongs. It’d take centuries to even make a dent.”

“Good to know we have Mr. Negative on our side,” Natasha muttered.

He forced a laugh. “That’s Mr. Snark, thank you very much.”

“I don’t care _what_ your name is!” an angry voice barked. “Do ya have a plan or not?

Tony turned to look at the the source, still not used to seeing a glorified rodent holding a giant gun. And talking. “I don’t have a full plan. Yet.” He stood up and stepped to the middle of the circle of weary heroes, pointedly not making eye contact with any of them. “Pulling people out of Soul World one by one isn’t going to work. Don’t bother checking the math—I already did. So somehow, we have to get everyone back to where they belong on this end.”

The raccoon glared at him. “So whadda we do? Break the Stone—?”

“ _No_!”

Several around the room flinched at the sound of his voice. “Easy, Tony,” Bruce warned, halfway out of his seat.

Tony paused a moment. He hadn’t meant to shout. Focus. He could do this. He took a breath and continued. “Destroy the Stone, and we risk destroying Soul World and everyone inside.”

Shuri’s voice rang over the com, her consciousness having already transferred back to her body in Soul World. “I’d very much like to not die again, thank you.”

Steve’s head shot up slightly at the sound of her voice. Poor old man. Still not totally caught up with how communication technology worked. At least he recovered quickly. “We won’t let that happen,” he assured the girl. Then he turned to Tony, careful to keep his movements slow so he didn’t startle the man. But that didn’t hide the bruises from Tony. The bruises _he’d_ caused. “So what do you think we should do?” he asked, slowly, as if he were speaking to a frightened child. Tony tried his best to ignore that.

“We need to find out a way to, for lack of a better term, drain everyone out of Soul World and back to where they belong,” he explained. “If we can get it right, then their ashes will reform into their original bodies, and everyone’s back where they belong.”

Shuri’s voice giggled. “ _That’s_ your plan?”

Tony shrugged, forgetting that she couldn’t see him. “I said it wasn’t a full plan. More like...12 percent of a plan.”

God, why did he have to say 12 percent? That moment in the tower? Pepper? He missed her so much. She was everything long before Peter ever came into his life.

He was supposed to spend the rest of his life with her. Married. _Committed_. But now...now she was gone too. His world had been a passenger in the car Happy was driving before fading. He hadn’t dared to look at the pictures yet. He didn’t suppose he ever would.

Because even if they _could_ save those trapped in Soul World, _his_ world was gone forever.

He could never get her back.

The others must’ve noticed his shift. Bruce was already cautiously creeping towards him, ready to jump on him should he snap again. Tony waved him away, rubbing his eyes before clutching his wrist. If only it would stop hurting. “Wong, based on your knowledge of mystical whatever, is it possible for them to reform if we release them from Soul World?”

Everyone turned to the sorcerer, who leaned back in his chair, clearly unprepared for the spotlight. “If all that’s there is their soul, as the name the Ancient One gave it suggests, yes, it is possible.”

Tony threw his hands in the air, startling everyone. “Give this man a medal!” he cried. “That’s the first thing that’s gone right all day!”

“I disagree,” Shuri huffed. “Pretty sure all of us being alive at all is the first thing.”

“Yeah, yeah. But the _point_ is: there’s a chance! There’s a chance, and I’m gonna make it work.” Tony practically burst at the seams, jittering with excitement. The pain in his arm was forgotten, replaced with the itch to build, create, _succeed_. He _needed_ this. _One bit_ of good news! He’d failed Pepper. He’d let his friends down. But. _But_! He could do this. He could still save everyone.

He could still save Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this one was a bit shorter than the last few, but I think it's about time we get things moving, don't you?
> 
> Just be prepared for the next part. It's very short, but...  
> well...  
> you'll see.


	7. Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sleepless nights take quite the toll.

This was going to work. It _was going to work_!

Tony stared at the plans glowing on the holoscreen in front of him, oozing with pride. He hadn’t slept a wink in nearly three days, but the plans were solid. Nothing was going to stop him. Not now.

Not the depression. Not the crippling anxiety. Not the panic attacks. Not the self-loathing. Not the reminder that he’d lost everything. Not the pang in his heart that told him his fiancée was gone forever. Not the distant memory of her smile. The way she’d smelled. The way she’d taken care of him for years, underappreciated and underpaid for all the shit he put her through.

God, he missed her.

But he still had Rhodey. Rhodey had always been with him, guiding his half-drunk ass through the shitshow. Rhodey was the one who kept him grounded—kept him safe from himself when Pepper just wasn’t enough. He was still around, still doing what he could.

But then there was Peter. He missed the kid’s innocent smile. Those big brown eyes staring up at him in awe. The responsibility he showed when he needed to most. Sure, his naiveté had been infuriating at times and his references needed some serious updating, but he was always trying his best—always doing what was right—regardless of whatever personal problems would arise from it.

It was scary how much Peter reminded him of himself.

But he couldn’t give up. Not when there was so much at stake. Not when he could still save the universe. Still save _him_.

Pepper was gone. He couldn’t fix that. He could _never_ fix that. And not a day would go by—not a day _had_ gone by—where he didn’t miss her. And it _hurt_. _So_. _Much_. But he had to distance himself. Save everyone, mourn later. Duty first, emotions last.

It wouldn’t be the first time he had to sew himself up and pray he didn’t fall apart.

He told the computer to start building the parts he would need. Normally, he would’ve loved to do it himself, but he couldn’t ignore the fatigue wrapping around him, coaxing him to rest. The soothing black of sleep would keep him from thinking. From remembering.

Everything would be ready for assembly in four hours. He could live with that.

He finally let his weary head drop to the desk. Hopefully Shuri wouldn’t mind him taking a catnap in her lab.

Heh. Catnap. Her brother was the Black Panther.

Yeesh. That was bad. Even for him. Even _Peter_ would’ve groaned at that one. Besides, T’Challa had faded, too. And T’Challa was King of Wakanda. Tony didn’t have the right to insult.

So tired.

“This is your plan?”

He shot up, whirling around in the chair so fast that it tipped over and threw him to the floor. That voice. It couldn’t be. _How_?

“It’s never going to work! You always fail when everything’s on the line!”

Tears blinded him. That was starting to happen too much, he noted. But he could still make out the form of the speaker. Why would he say that? _Why would he say that_?

“I hate you!” screamed Peter Parker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bet you didn't see that one coming.


	8. Ashes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when guilt catches up?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a brief warning, there's some slightly disturbing imagery and very raw emotion in this part.  
> And after glancing through the cast list for the next movie, I took a few liberties with who might show up.
> 
> Also, HOLY SHIT THANK YOU GUYS FOR 100+ KUDOS!! As an aspiring author, this is a huge deal for me. If you're interested in seeing some of my original stuff, you can find me on tumblr at [mslynnwrites.tumblr.com](https://mslynnwrites.tumblr.com).
> 
> Now, onto whatever the hell is happening with Tony...

Peter’s form shifted in and out of reality, constantly crumbling into ashes and reforming. “I hate you!” he repeated, his face momentarily falling apart before coming back.

That expression.

It just…

It _killed_ him.

Never before had Peter looked so _angry_. Not even after the Ferry Incident. Then, the kid had been more angry with himself than with Tony. Then, he’d merely misdirected his shame. Now, furious rage that rivalled the Hulk laser-beamed from his cold brown eyes. Now, his fracturing body trembled with bottled-up hate, and his lips were curled back in a feral snarl. Every second of looking at it wrenched Tony’s heart more, threatening to rip him to shreds.

“I _trusted_ you!” Peter cried. “You were my _hero_!”

Tony scrambled up, using the toppled chair as support. His legs quaked too much for him to stand. “P-Peter I—”

“ _No_!” The boy’s ever-shifting form inched closer. “This is the part where you _listen to me_!”

“Kid I can explai—”

“I did _everything_ you told me to! _None of this_ would’ve happened if it weren’t for you!

The words from the pier echoed in his mind. _None of this would’ve happened if you had just listened to me!_

“If you even cared, you wouldn’t have let me _die_ ,” he spat, now face to face with Tony.

It must’ve killed Peter to say that. It _had_ to. But not more than it killed Tony to hear it. “You’re not dead, kid...I-I can fix—”

“ _You can’t fix anything_!” Peter shrieked, grabbing hold of Tony’s jacket. “ _You let me die! I hate you_!”

The words stung more than the shrapnel that’d been embedded in his chest for so long. “Peter, please…”

He didn’t have an excuse.

He’d held Peter in his arms as he faded away and did _nothing_.

He had no one but himself to blame.

Peter’s scowl drilled into him. “You’re worse than Thanos,” he sneered, taking hold of Tony’s throat. “At least _he_ did it to save the universe. You just do it for _yourself_.”

“Please,” Tony choked, “kid, please. I never meant…” He couldn’t finish.

“Something happened to me, Mr. Stark,” the boy hissed. “Something bad. And I feel like that’s on _you_.” He gestured his free arm behind him. “We _all_ do.”

Tony peered past the boy, gasping for air. May Parker stood nearby, completely still. Her eyes pierced into his soul. And Happy. Happy was there, arms crossed and face sour, standing beside the door. Next to him stood a kid. A _child_. Harley Keener. Tony hadn’t even tried to see if the boy was still alive once he got back—he’d been so caught up in other things. But now he was here. He, like Peter, May, and Happy, continually shifted between ashen shades and physical forms. All of their stares blistered with hatred.

But the worst phased past the others, coming through the wall like some kind of horror movie. Blood ran down her crushed legs, seeping into her designer high heels. Her face was a mix of blood, exposed bone, and torn flesh. Unlike the other three, she didn’t shift from ashes to herself. Instead, she shambled towards him as a translucent ghost.

Straight out of a nightmare.

 _Pepper_.

“This is your fault, Tony,” she growled. “This is all your fault.”

She leaned over him, her breath cold. “To think I was going to marry _you_.”

God, everything hurt. His heart seized, the pain spreading through his body. He was sure he would break. If he hadn’t already, that is.

Peter finally released his throat, but he still couldn’t breathe. “Goodbye, Mr. Stark,” he said. “I’ll see you in _hell_.”

The shades dissipated, leaving Tony alone, writhing on the ground and soaked in sweat, his heart in tatters.


	9. Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stress often makes things worse, but heart-to-hearts are a good medicine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With everything that Tony's been through and done to himself *coughALCOHOLISMcough*, I'm honestly surprised they haven't had him face more consequences than PTSD and a few anxiety attacks.  
> Sure, Iron Man 3, Age of Ultron, and even Homecoming gave us a glimpse into his psyche, but sometimes these things have more dangerous _physical_ consequences.  
>  Also I like writing broken people for some reason. Don't ask why; there's no good answer.
> 
> In addition, a conversation with Steve! Because these two need to sort some things out.  
> Fun fact, it's _extremely difficult_ to write two men having an emotional conversation without people assuming they're gay. If it'd been Wanda and Natasha, no one would make assumptions or question it.  
> ...it's almost disappointing.  
>  I just want them to be friends, man.  
> (But honestly the way I write these two...it's totally shippable. Personally, I don't care, but if it's your ship, cool. If not, cool. In this story, at least, they're just a couple of guys bein' dudes.)
> 
> Also yes, for those concerned, that was _definitely not_ the real Peter in the last chapter. He'll have his moment later. Probably.  
>  **EDIT**  
>  Due to my Civil War knowledge being lacking and my complete neglect of the _main point_ of the movie, I have added in a mention of what actually happened in Siberia.  
>  That's my fault, but it's been fixed.  
> I know there's other things that are confusing (the whole Accords business), but I tried to show just how bad they were to begin with. Of course, I kind of used the wikia for my information, but I tried?  
> Anyways, thanks for pointing it out to me.

Steve was the one who found him. Why couldn’t it have been someone else? Like Rhodey? Or Bruce? Hell, he would’ve settled for Natasha or the weird raccoon thing.

Did it matter, though?

He was pretty sure he was dying. Or falling. One of the two. Both?

“Stark?” Steve called. “Stark are you down here?”

Tony heard the thud of Steve’s footsteps. He grunted, the pain in his chest flaming. He’d felt this kind of pain before. He was sure of it.

“Tony…?”

He needed Steve. To. Notice. Him. Dammit! He had to move! Do something! Anything! But even the slightest shift threatened to knock him unconscious.

He’d felt this before, yes. Crawling down the stairs, through the workshop, to the table. Shrapnel biting into his muscles. Every second was sheer agony. And his ears were bleeding. And the one thing that could keep him alive was so high up. He couldn’t reach. He fell. He was going to die. But he was saved. By the dumbest thing on the planet.

And now Steve was going to play that role.

“Cap,” he gasped, clutching at his chest. “Help.”

The man spun around, searching. Finally, _finally_ , he looked down. Down at Tony on the ground. “Tony?” The panic-stricken, pain-stricken face must’ve been enough to clue him in. “Oh shit Tony!”

Heh. Captain America said ‘shit’.

Steve pulled him up, draping one of Tony’s arms over his broad shoulders. Tony gasped, the motion sending a new wave of pain shooting through his nerves. This was worse than the first time. So much worse.

And there was no second chance this time. No extra arc reactor to jumpstart him this time.

He was so, so screwed.

He was going to die.

And he didn’t want to die.

“Help,” he repeated, his own raspy voice sending chills down his spine. “Please.”

“Hang on, Tony. Just _hang on_.”

He clung to Steve, trying to ignore the fear radiating off the other man. He tried to ignore the pain radiating through his chest. Tried to ignore the shock radiating through the other heroes as they burst from the lab door. No, _they_ were heroes. He was no hero. He was a failure, and he was dying.

Oh God, he didn’t want to die.

 _He didn’t want to die_.

Funny how fast things can turn around.

“Bruce!” Steve cried. “Where’s Bruce?”

Shuri’s voice echoed overhead. “He’s outside. What’s wrong?”

“Tony’s having a heart attack!”

The girl muttered something in her native tongue. Probably something naughty. Old Tony would’ve been pleased. But this was New Tony. Scared Tony.

No, ‘Terrified Tony’ sounded better.

God, he was terrified.

A clatter sounded off in another room. “Tony’s _what_?!” Ah. There was Rhodey. His old friend rushed in, his bionic prosthetics clanking on the wooden floors. “Shit Tony! What did you do!?”

He tried to respond. Tried to reassure. But he could only gasp for air. He couldn’t even do _that_.

He collapsed onto Steve, praying that somehow, he could save him. Then unconsciousness overtook him.

 

He woke up back on the medical bed. This time, an IV was shoved into his wrist. The left one. The one that always hurt. But then again, _everything_ hurt. _Everything_.

And he wasn’t alone. He glanced over to his right, and there was Steve. Asleep.

Right. There.

Tony couldn’t decide if the man was a complete idiot, or just brave.

He nudged the man with his other hand. “Hey. Hey!”

Steve jerked awake, scooting away ever so slightly when he realized Tony was awake.

Tony waved his hand around, hiding the fact that he was a little hurt by the movement. But it was warranted, he had to admit. “Yeah yeah. Sleepy time is over, now. Wake up. Come on. You can do it. You slept for 70 years already. I think that’s enough.”

Steve sighed. “Are you done?”

“What?” Tony bitterly laughed. “Too soon?”

“Tony, you had a massive heart attack. If we weren’t in Wakanda, you’d be dead right now. Or a vegetable.”

“First off, it wasn’t a heart attack. It was cardiac arrest. There’s a difference. Secondly, if I _ever_ become a vegetable, you pull the plug right away, yeah?” He couldn’t focus on what’d happened. He couldn’t. If he did, the image of people he cared about—people he’d pushed away—would haunt him.

Pepper.

 _Why_?

Steve rubbed his chin. Oh hey, he’d finally gotten rid of that stupid beard. Now he at least _looked_ like Captain America again. “I don’t really care about the specifics, Tony, I’m just glad you’re _alive_.”

Tony sat up slightly, wincing in pain. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt this shitty. “Yeah...me too.”

They fell into an uneasy silence. There was so much that neither were talking about—frustration, guilt, horror. Siberia. It’d been two years since they’d last spoken, and now the world was caving in, everyone they cared about was gone, and there were still _so_. _Many_. _Things_. Raw wounds breaking open again.

And everything hurt.

God, they used to be _friends_! _Teammates_! So why couldn’t they just _talk_?

But they could never go back, could they? They could never take back the words spoken—screamed. They could never take back the anger and pain they’d both caused. They could never look at each other without remember how brutally they’d fought. How many lives they’d endangered. How many people they’d hurt. How many relationships they’d broken.

“I’m sorry.”

Tony blinked, looking over at Steve. “What did you just say?”

The man shifted in his chair, his eyes downcast. “I’m sorry. For not telling you. You deserved to know.”

He didn’t know what to say. He’d been so full of rage and hatred when he’d first found out about his parents’ murders. And more so when Steve had admitted that he’d known. And the fact that Steve would betray him for his old friend from the war who’d done it? It just _hurt_. But that was _years_ ago. And nothing he could do would change that.

Steve had tried to make him see that before, but he didn’t listen.

Now they were both still dealing with the consequences of those actions.

But he forced himself to let go of it. The talks he and Pepper had had about it had certainly helped, but he made the choice right then that he wasn’t going to let it affect him.

Those secrets had caused enough damage already.

“And you know what?” Steve continued, shuffling uncomfortably. “You were right. The whole time.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Tony asked, sitting up more.

“The Accords. We _do_ need put in check. If we’d still been a team, I think this whole thing would’ve ended a lot differently.”

“Are you _kidding me_?” Tony shook his head, disbelief making the thin creases on his forehead more pronounced. Why was Steve so dumb sometimes? “If you’d gone along with the Accords, you never would’ve been in Wakanda. You wouldn’t have had _nearly_ as many people fighting with you, and I would’ve done the _exact same thing_.”

“You would’ve had backup.”

“I _had_ backup!”

Steve sighed. “You know what I mean, Tony.”

“No! No I don’t!” Why couldn’t Steve just _understand_? “Supporting those Accords was one of the _stupidest_ things I’ve ever done, and that’s _saying something_ , Rogers. Innocent people all over the world were _oppressed_ by it. I mean—” he waved his hands around, searching for some kind of example, “—the UN is out there _marking_ people with superhuman abilities, _arresting_ anyone they find too dangerous without trial or _anything_! And with that Inhuman outbreak or whatever, it’s only gotten worse! These people never asked for _powers_! Now they can’t even go outside without being called a _monster_! And I _supported it_!” Just the thought of how badly he’d screwed up made him want to break all over again. And so did the haunting image of Pepper’s ghost lurking in the back of his mind. “But you stood up for what’s _right_ , Steve. You fought to protect people that the world was turning its back on. If it weren’t for you standing up to it, it would’ve been _so_. _Much_. _Worse_. If anyone should be sorry, it’s me.”

Steve handed him a tissue. He hadn’t even realized he was crying again. Why couldn’t he stop? Why couldn’t he just go back and right all his wrongs? Repair the rift he’d so selfishly created?

Everything was his fault, and he knew it.

“If it weren’t for you,” he continued on, wiping the tears away, “more people would’ve gotten hurt. Wanda and Natasha would’ve been arrested, Thor probably wouldn’t be allowed on this _planet_ anymore, Vision might’ve been completely shut down a-and _murdered_ , _regardless_ of whose side he was on, and...and Barnes probably would’ve been executed.”

Steve was silent. He _knew_ the man was still mourning his friend. The same friend he’d given up everything to save.

Tony wished he had done the same.

“You really think that would’ve happened?” Steve asked, his voice so soft it was hard to hear.

“Yeah,” Tony replied. “I do.”

“Maybe…”

“Steve, I might talk a big game, but I’m not stupid. I’m not always right. I know that. I can’t even...I can’t even trust my own _mind_ right now.”

“No?”

He took a shaky breath. He didn’t want to think about it. Definitely didn’t want to _talk_ about it. But he had to. He...he needed someone to understand what was wrong.

He needed help.

Desperately.

“I was hallucinating,” he finally said. “Or maybe it was a dream. I don’t know. But...I saw…”

“People you lost?” Steve finished.

Tony paused and wiped at more tears trailing down his cheeks. “Y-yeah. A kid I met after my house blew up. Happy. Peter and May. A-and...and Pepper.”

“I...I heard what happened to her after…I’m sorry.”

“They hated me, Steve. Every single one of them.”

The man wrapped his arm around Tony’s shoulders. A bit awkward, but the gesture was appreciated. “No, Tony. No they didn’t. The only person who hates you is yourself.”

“I can think of several bad guys who would beg to differ.”

“You know what I mean.”

Tony let himself relax a bit, leaning on Steve for support. “Yeah.”

It was strange, feeling so comfortable next to someone he’d once fought against in blind rage. But it was nice.

It was nice, not being alone.

They sat like that for several minutes, Tony finally letting the pain and anxiety pour out of him. Finally letting the silent tears cascade down his face. Finally letting himself _feel_ for once. He’d spent _years_ holding back, trying to deny its existence, trying to convince everyone that he was fine—that he _wasn’t_ haunted day in and day out by what he’d done and failed to do. He should’ve told Pepper he loved her more often. He should’ve supported Peter more and let him know he _cared_. He should’ve tried to keep in touch with Harley. He should’ve, he should’ve, he should’ve…

He should’ve been better.

“You can’t fix everything, Tony,” Steve finally said. His face was slick with tears, too. “And you can’t live your life regretting what you missed.”

“I know.”

“And bottling everything up isn’t going to do you any good.”

“I know.”

“And pushing everyone away will only make it hurt more.”

“I know.”

Steve finally released him, staring deep into his eyes. “You’re not alone, Stark. Everyone here is going through the same thing. We’re just handling it differently.”

Tony cracked a thin smile. “Apparently my way of ‘handling it’ is ‘not handling it’.”

The other man chuckled. “You’re not wrong.”

“I mean, look at me! I’m nearly fifty years old, and I’m sobbing over things that happened while I was on another _planet_!”

“Stark, I still get upset over things that happened a hundred years ago. Trust me, I get it.”

“I just…I wish I could’ve done more.”

“You did everything you could, Tony. We all did.”

He pulled the IV out of his wrist, grimacing at the feeling of it sliding under his skin. “Yeah, well. I’m gonna go _do_ more.”

Steve started up, catching Tony before he could collapse when he tried to get out of the bed. “You sure that’s a good idea?”

“No,” he admitted. “But I’m sure those parts I needed are ready for assembly by now.”

“Well...alright, but at least let me help you.”

Tony smiled. For real, this time. “Like I could stop you.”


	10. Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone's working on a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing unfamiliar characters is hard.  
> For Captain Marvel, all I've got to go off of is cartoons, and it's been years since I last saw Ant-Man, so...  
> Yeah, sorry if they're not quite accurate to film portrayals. Obviously CM isn't out yet, but she will be next year so...  
> this story may not age well...
> 
> oh well.  
> enjoy.
> 
> Also, it wasn't until this chapter that I realized that Rhodey survived, so I had to go back and edit the past 2 chapters. That was fun.

They were in the lab, working on assembling the machine that would hopefully bring back those lost to Thanos’s Snap, when Steve finally asked the question Tony was dreading.

“Who was Peter?”

Tony tightened the bolt he was working on a little too much, the suddenness and nonchalance of the question catching him off-guard. “I thought Nebula told everyone what happened.”

“Her details were...sparse,” Steve replied, loosening the bolt slightly for him. “All she did was say that she crashed her ship into Thanos, and that a bunch of humans were fighting with the Guardians of the Galaxy or something, and that you took him on when everyone else was down.”

“Ah.”

“Yeah, and you mentioned someone named Peter earlier. I’m guessing he meant a lot to you, judging by the way you said it.”

Tony shrugged halfheartedly. “You could say that, I guess.”

“So...who was he?”

He set the wrench down and latched onto his aching wrist, trying to suppress the memory of Peter clinging to him as he faded. And the memory of his hallucination. He owed Steve this much, he supposed, considering he’d almost killed the man a few days ago and been repaid by him saving his life. “You...remember the Spiderman from Berlin?”

Steve nodded. “The kid from Queens?”

Tony bit his lip. Dammit, he wasn’t going to cry again. If he was going to _save_ Peter, he had to keep his emotions in check. “That was Peter,” he said quietly. “Peter Parker. He lives with his Aunt May in Queens. Hasn’t even _graduated_ yet. He...he said he wanted to be like me.”

“Sounds like a good kid,” Steve said, reaching for the wrench to tighten another bolt.

“Yeah. Well…” God, it hurt to talk about this. But Peter needed saving. Peter wasn’t going to wind up on the list of people he’d lost forever. “Hopefully you get to meet him after this is all over. Properly meet him, that is.”

The other man tossed the wrench back on the table, his job finished. “Yeah. I think I’d like that.” He grinned. “Gotta make sure you don’t rub off on him too much, y’know. We don’t need another Stark just yet.”

Tony couldn’t help himself. “Right you are, Captain,” he chuckled. “Peter ‘Starker’ just doesn’t have the same ring.”

Steve’s smile grew. “Tony, that’s awful,” he laughed.

“I know.”

They both sat on the floor for a few minutes, gazing up at the completed machine casing and laughing. It felt good to laugh again, even if it was just for a little bit. It felt good to smile again. It felt good to have _friends_ again. Friends who would be there when things got tough.

Friends who would understand when he was less than himself.

“Hey!” a voice shouted over the com. It sounded like the talking raccoon. “If you two bozos are done with your bromance, we’ve got a situation up here.”

Steve got to his feet. “We’ll be right there, Rocket,” he called, offering his hand to Tony. “Guess they need us.”

“Guess so,” Tony grunted, taking the hand and letting the other man help him up. They started up the stairs.

“Quick question, by the way,” Steve asked, “what’s a ‘bromance’?”

Tony chuckled. This poor man still had a lot to learn about the world he’d woken up in, huh? “I’ll tell you later.”

 

Their entrance was greeted with a smattering of unconvincing smiles and an elated Thor.

“Tony Stark! My friend!” the god shouted, leaping to his feet. “It is good to see you upright and walking once more!”

Tony tried to back away, but nothing could keep the Asgardian from his mission. Instead, he was forced to greet the other heroes with a weak wave while being crushed by Thor’s sudden bear hug. “Hi,” he managed.

Rhodey stood off to the side, grinning and snickering at the sight of his friend being crushed. Some friend.

Bruce turned away, but Tony still caught the smile he was trying to hide. Natasha kept her face neutral, but there was humor in her eyes. Steve didn’t even bother trying to help.

Seriously, what kind of friends were these people?

Finally, _finally_ , Thor released him. Tony, being his melodramatic self, let himself fall to the ground. “Oh God!” he cried with dramatic flare. “I thought he was never gonna let go.”

“ _This_ is Tony Stark?” someone said.

“Yup,” another replied.

“He’s a bit more intimidating in a fight,” yet another commented. “Except when I’m huge and he’s all tiny.”

Tony jumped to his feet. Other people? People he didn’t know? No wait. When did Clint get here?

“Glad you could join us, sunshine,” Barton said, his voice monotone and _tired_. Tony had a bad feeling he knew exactly what’d happened.

“Good to see you too, Clint.”

He shot him a mirthless smile and said no more.

“Lang,” Steve said, approaching the other man sitting next to Clint, “didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Yeah, well, when your daughter turns into _ash_ while you’re tucking her in for the night, you go figure out what the hell happened.”

Tony rubbed his arm. He knew _exactly_ how this man felt. That said, he wasn’t sure he recognized him. Nor the woman standing behind him.

“Name’s Carol,” she said, smirking at him. “Carol Danvers. Though you may know me better as Captain Marvel.”

“Never heard of you,” he replied. Then he turned to Natasha. “Are we just letting in everyone who comes to the door at this point?”

She shrugged. “I only let Clint and Scott in. ‘Captain Marvel’ here just kinda showed up.”

Danvers snickered. “The shields were made of energy. I eat energy for breakfast.”

The man whom Steve had addressed as ‘Lang’ stood up and extended his hand. “Name’s Scott Lang,” he said. “The Ant-man.”

Tony shook the man’s hand. “I would introduce myself, but you already know who I am.”

Lang laughed nervously, his eyes shifting around. “Um...right. It’s uh...it’s an honor.”

They were still shaking hands.

“I um...this handshake is…” He finally let go.

Tony shot an amused look at Steve, who shrugged. “He did the same thing to me.”

“Okay, now that we’re done learning everyone’s names, can someone fill me in on what happened?” Danvers asked.

Steve raised an eyebrow. “You don’t know?”

She shrugged. “I got an S.O.S from Nick Fury and everyone’s talking about people turning to ash. Pretty well sums up my knowledge on this whole thing.”

Tony smirked. “Short version: purple alien guy wanted shiny space rocks so he could wipe out half the universe. He got them.”

Everyone stared at him, expressions ranging from shocked and afraid to disappointed. Except Natasha, of course. She wasn’t much for expressions.

“What?” he said. “It’s what happened!” Maybe it was the way he said it. Or the fact that it was _him_ saying it. But hey, he was just being honest, even if it _was_ a little insensitive.

Okay, it was a _lot_ insensitive.

But he wasn’t there to play sensitive. He’d been through hell and still hadn’t found the way back yet. If they couldn’t take his dry humor, then that was on them; humor was the only thing that made life bearable anymore.

“Well, that’s a very basic rundown…,” Steve finally said, breaking the tension. “But um...you said Fury called you?”

“Yep. There was a whole thing in the 90s that he got involved in. I was there. Made sure he had a way to contact me if something major happened again.”

“You could say something major happened,” Tony scoffed. Everyone was still eyeing him. But hey, even if he didn’t really _feel_ like himself, he could most certainly _act_ like himself. He’d seen himself on TV enough before.

“So he killed half the universe?” Danvers asked, her face slightly unconvinced.

“He killed more than that,” Clint spat. Lang awkwardly tried to set a hand on his shoulder, but was brushed off as Clint stood. “Anyone who was alive could’ve disappeared, and that included drivers, pilots, and doctors. Anyone who could’ve been in charge of keeping people under their care alive. Millions were killed in the aftermath.”

Like Pepper. Tony clutched at his wrist. He wasn’t going to think about this right now. He had things to do. He could mourn later. In private. Preferably back home with his stash of liquor and things he can break.

“So we find this guy and kick his ass or something? Not much of a plan yet.”

Rhodey pushed off the wall and walked over to Tony. “Tony’s got a plan,” he declared, setting his arm across his friend’s shoulders.

Tony cleared his throat. “Yeah. Cap and I have the casing built, though I still need to program it. The idea is to drain the Soul Stone of all the people trapped inside. If everything happens the way it should, the half of the universe that was wiped out will return to wherever they were.”

Lang glanced at Clint. “Um...Mr. Stark, sir. Not to be rude or anything, but what about all those people that crashed? Won’t their ashes be in terrible places? Like, what if someone reforms at the bottom of the ocean in a plane or something? And that doesn’t save anyone who died in the aftermath.”

“Or anyone who was killed beforehand,” Thor added, a touch of anger hinting in his voice.

“Perhaps _I_ can be of assistance in that field,” another voice said.

Oh, how Tony wanted to punch that _smug grin_ off the newcomer’s face. “Well look who finally decided to show up,” he sneered.

Doctor Strange smiled somehow more infuriating than before. “Just remember who saved your life.” His ghostly astral form floated to the center of the room, the portal he’d come through closing behind him. “Now. I may have a way to save everyone, and not just those who are trapped.”


	11. Assemble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's about time the Avengers assembled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to make an actual _list_ so I could keep everyone straight. There's too many characters, and I now have a greater respect for the writers of Infinity War, because they had to deal with a cast twice the size and then some.  
>  Mostly, it's more planning and trying to figure out how to everyone fits in, while also trying to give everyone a place.
> 
> And no, I didn't forget about Hope. She's coming.

Tony had to admit, Strange’s plan fixed a lot of problems with his own. “Everyone needs to be drained from the Soul Stone first,” he explained. “Otherwise, they’ll remain trapped there regardless of what we do. After all, Soul World doesn’t operate on the same rules as this reality does. But once that’s managed, I can use the Time Stone in order to revert back to before this happened.”

Rocket, the bipedal raccoon growled. “But then Thanos’ll just do it all over again.”

Nebula shook her head. “Doubtful.”

“Oh yeah?”

Strange glared into them. “If you’ll let me finish, then I will explain.” The pair shut up. “We know where most of the Stones were prior to Thanos taking them. My magic will allow me to travel to those areas quickly and destroy them.”

“Is it possible to destroy them at all?” asked Tony, settling into a chair between Steve and Rhodey.

“Yes, though admittedly I would not be the best choice to do such a thing.”

Steve turned to him. “Wanda destroyed the one in Vision’s head, but Thanos undid the damage with the Time Stone.”

Danvers seemed to be taking quite an interest in the matter. “What does it take to destroy them?”

“A powerful stream of energy feeding into it will destabilize it, causing an explosion,” Strange replied. “Your abilities are more than capable, Captain Danvers.”

“I like the sound of that,” she grinned.

Tony raised his hand. “Ms. Danvers, what exactly is it that you can do?”

She looked down at him, amusement twinkling in her brown eyes. “ _Captain_ Danvers, Mr. Stark. And let’s see, I can fly, I’m incredibly strong, I can shoot lasers out of my hands, I can absorb energy… Oh! And I’m a _fantastic_ pilot. Used to be in the Air Force, actually.”

Steve looked impressed. “Air Force, huh? Not bad.”

“‘Not bad’?” she laughed. “Are you kidding me, Army? I fly around the _galaxy_ , and you say ‘not bad’? What a riot!”

Bruce finally spoke up, interrupting whatever Steve was about to say. Probably for the best. “This is great and all, but we still have to get the Stones away from Thanos. How are we going to do that?”

“I can help with that,” Lang said with a sheepish grin. “I was a thief long before I was Ant-man. I can get it away from him.”

“That’s oddly confident for a guy who’s never even _seen_ Thanos,” Tony scoffed.

“I can do it,” he reassured him.

Rocket smirked. “You’ll need help. Besides, Thanos killed my entire family. I’d _love_ to steal everything from him.”

No one mentioned that he’d just called the other Guardians his family. It was probably better that way.

Lang pulled out his phone. “If no one cares too much, I can call my girlfriend for help. She’s got a shrinky suit, too.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. This guy had a girlfriend? One who was still alive? “Why didn’t she come here with you?”

“She um...she stayed to help her dad keep things under control back home…”

So most of the people close to him survived. Somehow, that didn’t settle well with Tony. Rocket seemed to be having second thoughts, too.

“We still have to find Thanos,” Natasha pointed out. “None of us have a clue where he is.”

That silenced everyone. She was right; no one knew. Nebula was the only person who personally _knew_ Thanos at all, and the only information she had was that he wanted to watch the sun rise on a grateful universe or some stupid sappy shit like that.

“I might be able to track him.”

Everyone’s eyes shot to Bruce. Confidence glowed in his eyes. “The Infinity Stones give off a very specific gamma signal. And with all of them together, I might be able to track them to wherever they’re at. And if we find the Stones, we find Thanos.”

Tony grinned. Finally, the plan was starting to take shape. “Whatever you need, just let me know. I’ll make it happen.”

“I’ll make a list.”

“So this is it?” Rhodey asked. “This is our plan?”

Strange grinned. “So it would seem.”

Steve stood up. “Alright. Tony and Bruce will set everything up. Find Thanos and make sure the machine is ready for the Stone. Scott, Rocket, and Natasha, figure out a way to steal the Soul Stone _and_ the Time Stone from Thanos. We can’t have him undoing everything. If you can get any others, get Reality first, Mind second, Space third, Power last. Don’t take any of the extra ones unless you’re _absolutely certain_ you can without getting caught. Everyone else, we protect Tony and his machine.”

“That’s a lot of people protecting, Captain,” Danvers remarked. “Any particular reason?”

He nodded. “Thanos had an army of alien creatures and a small group that called themselves the ‘Children of Thanos’. I wouldn’t put anything past him once he figures out what our plan is.”

“The only ‘Children of Thanos’ were Gamora and I,” Nebula said. “The others were merely tools. They were called the Black Order. Which ones did you encounter?”

“Well there was Squidward and a big ugly guy, but I don’t know any others,” Tony said.

Nebula looked at him like he was the dumbest person on the planet. It only occurred to him after a moment that she probably had no idea who Squidward was in the first place. Fortunately, Strange rescued him. Again.

Maybe it was more _un_ fortunate?

“He meant Ebony Maw,” he sighed, frowning at Tony.

“I see. The other is presumably Cull Obsidian.”

“There were a couple others that attacked us,” Natasha said. “Blue chick with horns and some guy with a fancy blade-staff.”

“Proxima Midnight and Corvus Glaive,” Nebula muttered. “Are all of them dead?”

“Yes,” Strange replied. “And yet you seem worried about something.”

“There is another member of the Black Order. Supergiant. She’s a parasitic telepath who feeds off intellect. She can possess anyone she wants without much effort.”

The tension in the room raised about ten degrees. “Sounds lovely,” Tony said.

“Hardly,” Nebula snorted. “She’s the most dangerous in the entire Order. If Thanos learns of our plans, then she will fight for him. And if she is with him, she will sense your presence even if Thanos does not.”

Steve steeped his fingers. “It’s a risk we’re going to have to take.”

“You may be correct, Terran.”

“But we need something Supergiant can’t possess to fight her,” Tony mused. “I’ll handle it.”

“How the hell’re you gonna _handle_ it, wise guy?” Rocket barked.

Tony grinned, adding in some classic Stark flair. “By being _me_ , of course.” He turned to Steve. “Gimme a day or two and I’ll crank out some new suits with basic independent AIs. I doubt she can control something that doesn’t think, and without me controlling all of them, she can’t just possess _me_ and shut them all down.”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “We’re not going to have another Ultron incident, are we?”

Tony blinked. So he was going _there_ , huh? Rude. “No, they won’t be _nearly_ as advanced as Ultron. Besides, Ultron took both me _and_ Bruce, plus a lot of time and effort. Also I’d never risk anything like Ultron ever happening again.”

Thor, who’d been impressively quiet the whole time, finally spoke. “I could take on this ‘Supergiant’. I have fought many dangerous foes before. Surely she cannot be _that_ bad.”

“Didn’t Wanda get you with her mind thing?” Clint asked.

The god of thunder blushed. “Y-yes…”

“Probably best to let Tony’s robots handle things, then.”

Steve clapped his hands once. Everyone’s attention was drawn back in. “So an army of Iron Men will handle Supergiant. And Tony, if you and Bruce could design something that might block her control, that would be great. Anything else we should discuss before we get to work?”

Everyone shook their heads.

“Fantastic. Once everything’s been built and Thanos located, we’ll meet back here and...well...I guess we’ll be taking out Thanos. If anyone has anymore ideas, let me know.”

“Or me,” Tony added. “If you want an upgrade, I’ll see what I can do.”

With that, they dispersed. Clint wandered off, uninterested in anyone. Natasha, after a moment, went after him. Lang went a different direction, messing with his phone and nearly running into a wall. Nebula went to sulk somewhere far away from everyone, but Danvers followed her. Rocket muttered something about needing a nap. Thor went to go play with his axe, and Rhodey went to watch. Wong and Strange disappeared through a portal, which was a shame, since Tony wanted to ask about Soul World—how he’d got back, what he’d seen.

If he’d found Peter.

God, it was infuriating, not knowing if he was okay.

By now, only Bruce and Steve remained. “Wanna get something to eat before we disappear to the lab for three more days?” Bruce asked.

Tony shrugged. He had to admit, he was absolutely starving. “Probably won’t kill me.”

Steve smiled. “If you can take on Thanos, I think a sandwich will be fine, Stark.”

He had to agree. “So...shawarma?”

The trio of friends wandered off, chuckling softly at the memories of old battles and days long gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One step closer to finding Thanos.  
> One step closer to saving Peter.  
> And the first step towards saving Pepper.


	12. Prepared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last minute preparations are incredibly important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest here, I didn't really want another chapter of sitting around talking and planning, but I feel like it flows better with it.  
> But things will finally start pulling together next chapter.

Everything was prepped and ready to go. The Iron Legion, the Thanos tracker, psionic scramblers, the machine to drain the Soul Stone. He called it Souleater. Peter probably would’ve loved that name.

But now the matter of where the battle should take place was the biggest question. Wakanda seemed an obvious choice until they realized just how damaged the defenses were. And plus, the citizens didn’t want to be attacked again. Not when they were still mourning. “You must find somewhere else,” Queen Ramonda had told them.

Shuri’s voice came over the com. “You should probably do it far from any settlements. Maybe on another planet entirely?”

“Don’t know many other planets,” Clint said. He’d hardly spoken to anyone since he’d shown up. Somehow, he sounded worse than before, too. “So unless someone who’s been to space has a better plan, then I _still_ think we should do it here.”

“You heard the Queen, Clint,” Steve replied. “We can’t fight here and risk the people. Not again.”

“What about all the heroes that faded here?” he shot back. “They could help us once they come ba—”

“Titan,” Tony murmured.

The two stopped bickering and stared at him. “Titan?” Steve asked.

Tony nodded. “Yeah. It’s empty, got breathable air, and most importantly, we have heroes there who faded, too.” He did his best to push back the memories of Peter crumbling away in his arms. He couldn’t mourn. He had to fix this. He could still save him.

Strange’s astral form hovered nearby. “Including me. Once I’m back in my body, I’ll be able to use the Time Stone to undo the damage.”

“Quick question,” Rhodey interjected, raising his hand, “How are we supposed to get all of us, plus a bunch of robots to Titan?”

Tony glanced over at Strange. “Doc?”

“Wong and I can create portals there,” Strange said. “The distance will take a bit of a toll on us, but it will take a while to set up everything.”

“What about getting the Stones?” Scott asked. “How are we getting to Thanos in the first place?”

“Wong will take care of that.”

“To make things a bit easier,” Nebula said, “I can transport all the machinery that doesn’t require setup on Quill’s ship.”

Rocket jumped up. “Like _hell_ you can! I’m not letting you _touch_ those controls!”

Strange glanced at the rodent, eyebrows up. “She already has, and it will be perfectly fine.”

“Oh what, now the _ghost_ is calling the shots!?”

“I saw the future, Rocket. One where we succeeded.”

Steve pursed his lips. “What‘s the cost?”

“I can’t say.”

He didn’t seem to like that answer. Of course, neither did Tony. Looking around, he didn’t think he could stand to lose anyone else. Even Nebula and Rocket were starting to grow on him. And the late addition Hope van Dyne, who’d flown in the day after their last meeting, seemed nice enough. But Strange had seen what would happen. He had to go with it. For Peter. For Pepper.

He stood up. “So let’s get away from who’s getting who where how and talk about Thanos.” He pulled up a holoprojector and zoomed in on a planet halfway across the galaxy. “This is where we’ve tracked the Infinity Stones, so Thanos is here.”

Nebula glared at the screen. “That’s Zen-Whoberi,” she growled.

Tony looked over at her. “You know it?”

The woman nodded. “It’s Gamora’s home planet.”

“That dirty son of bitch,” Rocket snarled.

Steve cleared his throat. “Language,” he grunted.

So the plan was looking great. “So he's on Zen-Who-Whatever. That’s our location.”

Steve shook his head. Apparently humor wasn’t going to be tolerated this time. “Wong, you’ll be going to with Natasha’s team to retrieve the Stones. Help them however you can.”

“Surely we can name it something better than ‘Natasha’s team’,” Lang said, a huge grin plastering his face. “I was thinking something like ‘Steal Team 6’ or ‘Operation Swiper No Swiping’.”

His girlfriend raised an eyebrow. “There’s only five of us going…”

Tony had a feeling Lang was just trying to boost his own morale. Watching his daughter disappear must’ve really hurt him. He almost felt bad for envying him before. “What about ‘Operation Stone’?” he suggested.

Steve waved his hands around. “Fine! Whatever! I was just—! Nevermind.” He took a moment to recompose himself. “So ‘Operation Stone’ will go to Zen-Whoberi and steal back the Stones and return to Titan as quickly as possible. I don’t think I need to reiterate how _important_ it is that Thanos _does not find out you’re there_.”

Lang shot him a thumbs-up. “We’ve gotcha covered, Captain.”

Natasha and Hope rolled their eyes. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t screw up,” Hope reassured them.

Rocket merely gave him a toothy grin. Wong didn’t respond at all.

“Nebula, you take the Iron Legion to Titan on Quill’s ship,” Steve continued. At least _someone_ could stay on-task. “Captain Danvers and Colonel Rhodes, I’d appreciate if you went with her.”

The two former officers saluted him. “You got it, Cap,” Rhodey said. Nebula looked like she’d just opened a present, only to find a dead cat.

“The rest of us will set up on Titan. Once we have some idea of the terrain, we can come up with a defense plan.” Steve looked around. “Are we all clear on the plan?”

“Yep,” Danvers chuckled. “You’ve only reiterated it about three times.”

“I’ll say it again if necessary.”

Tony had a feeling he wasn’t kidding. The tension in the room was palpable; no one needed reminded that they had one shot at this. Anything screwed up, and they were all dead, along with a massive part of the universe.

Just the _thought_ of it made him uneasy.

But he had to keep it together. For Pepper. For Peter.

“Alright then.” He stood up, looking each and every one of them in the eyes. “I may not have known some of you very long, but I’m proud to be fighting alongside you.”

Shuri finally piped up again. “I’ll be much happier when I’m out of Soul World, Captain, so can we wrap it up, please?”

Steve smiled. “Of course, Shuri.”

Before they could break, though, Queen Ramonda entered the room. Everyone fell silent and stared. “So you are leaving now?” she asked.

“Yes, Queen Mother,” Steve said. “I wish I could promise the return of your children but...I can’t.”

Her tired eyes lowered. “Whatever happens,” she said, “know that we have faith in you.”

“We’ll do our best, ma’am.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Wakanda forever,” she said, her voice cracking slightly. “May Bast protect you, Avengers.”

Before anyone could respond, she turned and left the room, her feet heavy on the wooden floors.

“No pressure,” Lang murmured.

“We can do this,” Steve said. Tony almost believed him with that tone of voice. But even then, he was starting to sweat a little. This had to work. He _needed_ it to work.

Strange and Wong opened their portals to Titan. “Quickly,” Strange said. “We can’t keep these open for long.”

Everyone filed in until Tony and Strange were the only ones left. Before he went back to Titan, back to the place he’d failed to stop Thanos, he had to know one thing. “Did you know?”

Strange stared at him for a moment, probably debating whether or not telling him would ruin the one possible future of over fourteen million they were aiming for. “If you’re asking as to whether or not I knew they would die, then yes. I did.”

“And you just let it happen.”

“If I’d tried to stop it, we would’ve died. And if we’d have died, we wouldn’t be on a path towards success. Also, you needed the push.”

Just what he needed: another Nick Fury trying to dictate how he should respond to situations. How he could say that with genuine sincerity and still not care, Tony would never know. All he needed to know, he now knew.

Strange was 100% a dick.

Tony shook his head in utter disgust. If the wizard wanted to toy with people, then that was _his_ problem. But if he knew what was good for him, he’d stay away from Tony and his friends and family. Forever.

He forced himself through the portal without another word, stepping out into the ruins of Titan once again.


	13. Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Titan is full of bad memories, and it's all still so fresh.

They hadn’t even set anything up yet, and he was already terrified.

Just _seeing_ the rusty landscape again sent numbness through his legs.

Less than a week had passed since The Snap. In that time, he’d managed to almost strangle his friend to death twice, be electrocuted, barely sleep at all, hallucinate, have a heart attack, and generally be in poor mental health. How was he supposed to do this?

He couldn’t do this. Being here. He couldn’t. It was too much. It was too soon. He could see the place where he’d held Peter and watched him crumble to dust. He could feel the boy in his arms once again. He could hear Peter’s sobbing as he begged Tony to help him.

He dropped to his knees, all confidence drained. He couldn’t do this. He wasn’t strong enough. _You always fail when everything’s on the line!_ the hallucination had cried. He knew it was true. _You. Could’ve. Saved. Us,_ Steve had said in a vision. The same vision where all of his friends were dead. _Why didn’t you do more?_

“I tried,” he murmured. He didn’t care if they were real or not; he knew they were right. _You’re worse than Thanos. You just do it for yourself._

A hand rested on his shoulder. “Breathe, Tony,” Steve said. His voice was steady—something _real_ to grasp onto. “You’ve got this. Just breathe.”

He sat down next to Tony. They stayed there for several minutes, staring out at the broken world.

He had to do this. Peter needed his help, no matter _what_ his hallucination had said. And Pepper needed him, too. It didn’t matter if they hated him for failing, or if they never wanted to see him again, or even if he died trying.

He had to save them so they could keep being the people he loved, even if they never loved him back.

But it _hurt_.

 _God_ , it hurt.

The ghost of Strange floated down. “The ‘Souleater’ is in place, whenever you’re ready,” he said. If the man had physically been there, Tony might’ve tried to strangle him like he’d tried to with Steve. That monster had let this happen. Had been _pivotal_ for letting this happen.

But he didn’t even have the strength to respond anymore.

He couldn’t even remember back to the days when being a hero was simple anymore. Back before the Accords, before the Avengers. Back when he was just starting out. No pain, no suffering, no nightmares, no living in constant fear. Back when he was just a rich guy looking for a thrill. When he could completely ignore the impending doom he constantly found himself in because he was the _smartest_ and the _strongest_ and the _best at everything_. _Nothing_ could touch _Tony Stark_ , famous billionaire in a cool suit of armor.

He’d started all this almost a _decade_ ago.

And now? He just wanted it to be over. He wanted his family and friends back. And he wanted to retire from all this ‘hero-ing’. He just wanted to be a normal guy. He wanted to stop living in constant fear and finally settle down. He was _long_ overdue for that. And Pepper deserved so much more than he could _ever_ offer her.

But first, he had to save her.

He forced his shaking legs up and glared out at the ruins. This wasn’t going to be their final stand. He was going to make sure that this worked _exactly_ the way they needed it to. And once they’d succeeded, he was going to go home, hopefully still get married, and forget all this insanity had happened.

“You good, Tony?” Steve asked, his hand still set on his shoulder.

“As good as I’m gonna get. Give me a few minutes to power things up and we’ll be set.”

“Let me know if you need any help. I’ll get everyone into position.” Steve started off towards the others, who were milling around like lost children in the woods.

Tony reached out and caught his arm before he could go. “Steve,” he said. What did he want to say? All this self-reflection was making him feel sappy and scared. He didn’t want to lose anyone else. He _definitely_ didn’t want to lose Steve. Not now. Not when their friendship was finally on the mend.

A shame it’d taken the destruction of half the universe to repair that rift.

“Just…” God, he wanted to say so much. How much he appreciated all the support and care. How he was glad to have become friends with someone who’d seen so much and _understood_. How he wanted to thank him for forgiving all of his stupid, horrible, dangerous mistakes that had cost them both so much. But…the words wouldn’t form.

“I know, Tony,” Steve sighed, clasping Tony’s arm and pushing it away gently. “And I know that whatever happens, we’ll have done the best we can.”

“...Just don’t die on me, okay?”

The other man smiled. “Even if I do, don’t ever give up hope.”

Before he knew it, he was hugging the man. And sobbing. Again. God, why did he feel so _emotional_ right now? Surely Steve didn’t need the extra baggage of a broken man like Tony. He had defenses to plan and soldiers to command. He didn’t need Tony hanging on him like...like Peter had clung to _him_.

And yet, Steve’s arms cautiously wrapped around him. “We’re going to fix this, Tony,” he murmured. “Together. As a _team_.”

Tony broke away as fast as he’d come on. “Sorry. Sorry. I didn’t—”

“It’s okay, Tony. I get it. It’s not your fault.”

He didn’t have the willpower to try and convince him otherwise.

“But when this is all over and we go back in time to before Thanos got any of the Stones, promise me something.”

He forced himself to look up into Steve’s eyes. “What’s that?”

“Promise me you’ll call.”

He choked back another sob. “You got it, Cap.”

Steve clapped him on the arm. “Go get ‘em, soldier,” he said. “And remember that I’m with ya ‘til the end of the line.”

Tony watched him go, wiping tears from his eyes. He had to pull it together. If Steve could believe in him, surely he could believe in himself.

He could do this.

He started off towards the Souleater, where Bruce and Strange were doing last-minute checks before the initial start-up. Once they had the Stones, they could get everyone back. And once everyone was back, Thanos was going to regret having ever _thinking_ of taking them all down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I just really love my sappy boys, even if it's not necessarily in-character. But let's face it, Tony's been holding everything back for a _long. time._  
>  Dude needs a freaking hug.


	14. Relax

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How can anyone relax with these circumstances?

The Iron Legion arrived a few hours later. The Souleater was powered up and ready. Operation Stone was underway, and everyone was in position.

Now it was just a matter of waiting.

Tony _hated_ waiting.

He paced back and forth, pointedly not looking at anything left over from the first fight with Thanos. The broken boulders from the moon, the wreckage of Nebula’s ship, the splatters of blood here and there. The ashes.

No, he wasn’t looking at any of it.

Already, he’d double-checked each unit of the Iron Legion three times and he’d checked the Souleater about five. He’d fiddled with the newer nanotech suit he’d built in the downtime of _everything_ _else_ being constructed about a dozen times, making sure he hadn’t missed anything. He’d gone through about seven scenarios of what he would say to Pepper once he saw her again, and he’d gone through four for Peter.

And now he was pacing.

Waiting was the _worst._

“So much for _relaxing_ ,” Bruce called wryly.

Tony stopped pacing and stared at his friend lounging by the Souleater. “How the hell am I supposed to _relax_ when we’re _so close_? And when _anything_ could go wrong in an instant?”

“Trust me, man, I’m freaking out just as much as you are.”

“Are you?” He walked over to join him by the machine. “I’d have thought you’d be a bit more green.”

Bruce grinned. “I’m better at keeping a lid on it, remember.”

“Yeah, no kidding.”

“Just everything that’s _happened_...it’s _insane_!” Bruce gestured toward the stars glimmering in the sky. “I mean, I fought in a space gladiator arena, I fought Thor’s sister, and I attacked a giant monster made of fire and watched him blow up Asgard. Also I think I’m in love with a warrior chick that’s older than Thor, but...don’t tell Natasha.”

“I thought the Hulk did all that fighting and stuff,” Tony replied. He had _every_ intention of telling Natasha later. “Not sure about the warrior chick thing but everything else…”

“Yeah, technically, but...we’re almost the same person, I guess? Like a coin. We’re just two different sides.”

Tony nodded. “I know what you mean. Well. Aside from the whole ‘turning green and smashing everything’ thing.”

“I was thinking you’re more of a die? You’ve kind of been all over the place this week.”

“Yep,” he smirked wanly. “I’m a mess.”

Bruce stared up absentmindedly. “Once Strange reverses time, I’ll probably be back on Sakaar. But after Ragnarok and all that, maybe I’ll actually get to come back to Earth. Be _me_ again.”

“Maybe you’ll get the Hulk thing sorted out, finally.”

“Yeah.” Poor guy looked so wistful. Tony guessed _he_ just wanted to be normal again, too. “But y’know, if you ever need a hand, let me know.”

Tony smiled. “Steve said something real similar. Are you guys ganging up on me now, or something?”

“Hey, if Steve said it too, then we must all be on the same wavelength.”

“Pretty sure Steve’s wavelength is still stuck in the 40s.”

“Well whatever! The _point is_ , we’re your friends, Tony, and we’ve got your back. All you’ve gotta do is let us know you need us.”

Tony chuckled at that. “The last time I called you for help, you fell asleep.”

Bruce actually _laughed_. “I _told you_ : I’m not a therapist! The stuff I could’ve helped with was already over!”

“And here I thought you _cared_ about my mental health!” Tony quipped, faking offense.

Before they could continue on, a tiny portal opened by their feet. Five figures fell out of it before sizing up to their normal size.

“You guys are _so lucky_ we had Wong!” Scott Lang screamed. “If he hadn’t duplicated our suits onto you guys, you’d all be a pile of goo on the floor!”

“It was _your_ stupid plan that got us into that mess in the first place!” Rocket shouted back, somehow looking more intimidating than the man standing at three times his height. He wore an ill-fitting suit very similar to the Ant-man costume.

“Whoa! Guys!” Bruce said, standing and getting between the two. “Easy! What the hell happened?”

Natasha pinched the bridge of her nose. She wore a duplicate of Hope’s Wasp suit. “Rocket had the idea of stealing the _entire Infinity Gauntlet_. Thanos had that place rigged with all sorts of traps. One of them being himself.”

Hope lifted off her helmet. “So Scott had Wong duplicate our suits with magic so we could shrink down and escape.”

“We almost _died_ because of your _stupid plan_ , Rocket!” Lang snarled. He wasn’t wearing his helmet.

“Pym particles can affect brain chemistry if you’re not properly protected,” Hope explained. “So Scott gave Wong his helmet so nothing would happen to him and he could give us a portal out.”

Wong pulled off the Ant-man helmet. “I would have duplicated the helmet, too, but it was too complex to do in a timely manner.”

“Natasha seems fine,” Tony commented.

“I’ve had things mess with my brain before,” she replied. “I think I can handle some weird chemistry.”

“Fair enough.” Bruce was trying to get between Rocket and Lang. Hopefully no one accidentally unleashed the Hulk. “Did we at least get the Gauntlet?”

Hope handed him the tiniest glove known to man. “Got it right here. Not sure how we’re gonna get the Stones out of it, but it’s here.”

Tony stared at it. It was hard to remember that he was holding so much power when the thing was about the size of a pentip. “How do we make it big again?”

She put her helmet back on. “One second.” She shrunk down and buzzed to his palm. He couldn’t see exactly what she did, but suddenly the gauntlet expanded to its normal size. He almost threw it with how sudden the change was.

Hope hopped down and resized herself. “There you are. One giant glove complete with gemstones.”

He looked the gauntlet over. The thing was so big, he could probably stick it on his head and still have room to spare. Cracks laced through the metal, charred in multiple places. The thing looked like it could fall apart at any second. “I don’t think Thanos could do another Snap if he wanted,” Tony mused, turning it over. The Stones glowed faintly. “Let’s get these things out and save our friends.”

 

Tony and Bruce stared at the Souleater two hours after the thieves had returned. The scans on the Soul Stone had gone well. All tests had checked out. It was ready to go.

It was actually happening.

“You ready for this, Tony?” Bruce asked.

“I...I don’t know.”

Having everyone back would be amazing. Seeing them all again, knowing he’d contributed to saving them...but then Strange would rewind time. Would he even remember what’d happened? Would he still understand just how precious everyone was to him? Or would he just carry on like nothing had happened?

Honestly, he could see the benefits of both remembering and forgetting.

Forget, and he wouldn’t have to live with the nightmares of the past week. He wouldn’t have to feel Peter crumbling in his arms every time he thought about him. He wouldn’t have to deal with the anguish of his hallucination.

But he’d forget how liberating it’d felt to finally let go of all the pain and talk to someone. He’d forget just how important the most important people in his life really were. He would still be isolated and alone, never wanting to admit his mistakes to others and always putting up a front.

Either way, paranoia would still consume most of his waking hours, he was sure.

But he had no choice. He had to bring everyone back. It wasn’t about him anymore—it was about _them_. And they needed him.

“Power it up, Bruce.”

God, he hoped this worked.

The machine whirred to life. The Stone within it glowed bright orange. So bright, it rivaled Titan’s sun. The two scientists turned away, shielding their eyes. The Souleater’s whine developed into a high-pitch shriek. Like a screaming woman.

And then it was over, just like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~It's happening~


	15. Watch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Could the plan have succeeded? Did they win?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just finished writing the rest of the story last night, so it's all ready for posting from here. I think you guys are gonna like the ending.  
> But who cares about endings right now? They just used the machine, and things are looking up!  
> ...Right?

Tony looked around, blinking spots out of his eyes. The machine lay dormant, and the Stone no longer glowed at all. But nothing else seemed to have changed.

Why didn’t it work? Had they done something wrong? But they’d run the numbers countless times! Did they have the wrong Stone? No, it should be the orange one, and it _was_! So _why didn’t it work_?

Did…

Did they just kill everyone...?

Oh no. Oh God please no. No no no _no no no NO_!!! They didn’t! They couldn’t have!

He sank to the ground, shock and despair seeping into every nanometer of his body. No. This couldn’t be right. This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t have. Everything should’ve been right. Everything should’ve _worked_!

He should’ve known. Dammit, he should’ve known.

_You always fail when everything’s on the line!_

_You’re worse than Thanos!_

_You let me die!_

_None of this would’ve happened if it weren’t for you!_

_I hate you!_

Pepper’s ghost loomed behind him, her broken form dripping blood onto the dusty ground. “You truly are the _worst_ humanity has to offer,” she hissed. Each word cut into him like a knife. This wasn’t right. This wasn’t supposed to happen. They were supposed to come back.

Guilt tore him to shreds.

This was _all_. _His_. _Fault_.

Hollow wails rolled across the landscape. The spirits of all the people he’d just killed— _murdered_ —with his _stupid plan_.

“Tony!” Bruce cried. “Tony, look!”

He could barely see, could barely hear, over his own anguish. It was like he was underwater, hopelessly drowning. Dust swirled at his feet. Ashes. So many ashes.

Wait.

Ashes?

Moving?

He shakily got to his feet, watching the ashes swirl around, gathering. They clumped together, building themselves back up. First came the bug lady. She stumbled forward, her huge black eyes wide in surprise. Then came the burly tattoo man. He looked around, clearly disoriented. Then came Quill. Quill blinked, his face scrunching up in confusion. “What the hell?” he asked. Then he caught sight of Tony. “Wow you look like—”

“ _Quill_!” a harsh voice cried. The man turned only to catch Rocket in the chest. “You’re alive! Ya little shit! It worked!”

Tony left Quill to handle the raccoon. He had more important things to worry about. Strange had already reformed, though his astral form was nowhere to be seen. But where…

“M-Mr. Stark?”

Tony whipped around, nearly collapsing under himself. He was shaking so bad, so terrified. What would the kid think? What was he supposed to say? What—

Screw it.

Who cared?

Peter stumbled a little, and for a second, Tony thought he might just disappear again. But he stayed. He was whole. He was _there_. _Alive_.

His emotions jumbled together into a potent mixture of relief, anxiety, and fear. He could barely believe this was actually _happening_! That this was _real_! The last time he’d felt like this was when he saw Pepper alive after the whole ‘Extremis’ incident. And soon, he would see her again. _Alive_. But first…

“Mr. Stark? W-what—?”

Tony stepped towards the boy, tears brimming in his eyes. He set his hands on his shoulders, trying to ignore the shaking. “Kid…” he whispered.

Peter stared up at him with those innocent brown eyes. So young, yet somehow so mature. Did he even remember what’d happened? Did it really matter?

No. No it didn’t.

Before Peter had a chance to react, Tony pulled him close, hanging on as if he might disappear again. He couldn’t lose the kid again. Never again. He wasn’t going to let something like this happen ever again.

Not on _his_ watch.

“Mr. Stark? A-are you ok? I-I don’t know what happened...”

He let go of the kid and wiped his eyes. “I...it’s been a long week, kid.”

“A _week_!?” Peter cried. “B-but I was just...I…” His face went slack with panic, and he ran a hand through his hair. “Aunt May...i-is she okay? Oh no, she’s gonna kill me.”

“She’s alright, and no. No she won’t. She’ll be happy you’re _alive_.” And soon, Pepper would be back, too. He could have both of them back. “God, I can’t believe you’re _alive_.”

Peter stared at him for a moment, apprehension tinting his gaze. But then he lunged forward, clinging to Tony so tightly that he thought he might be crushed. Sometimes he forgot just how _strong_ the kid was. “Thank you,” Peter whispered.

Shit, now _both_ of them were sobbing.

“You’re alright, Peter, you’re alright,” Tony murmured. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“I-I know. Just...thank you. For everything.”

The kid pulled away, smiling. Just seeing him happy and alive warmed Tony’s heart. He didn’t think anyone but Pepper could ever do that to him, but somehow this crazy teenaged fanboy of his had managed it. “I think it’s about time we head home, Pete, don’t you?”

He nodded. “I’m...I’m ready for this to be over.”

Tony glanced away. “Doc? You gonna send us back or what?”

Strange stared at them, an eerie expression planted on his face. He’d finally gotten up, which was good, but he just... _stood_ there.

Peter took a step towards the man. “Dr. Strange? A-are you okay?”

Tony peered at Strange, anxiety filling him. Strange wouldn’t turn on them now, would he? Surely not...right? But then why was he acting so...well... _strange_? “Doc…? It’s done now. We can go back. You...you still with us?”

Strange’s head jerked slightly so that now he stared at Tony. And for just a split second, Tony saw terror flashing in the man’s eyes. But they iced over in an instant. Something was wrong. Something was _very_ wrong.

Peter stepped back away from the wizard. “Mr. Stark…?”

“Yeah...I saw it, too...”

Strange sneered, his face remaining otherwise expressionless and cold. “You have made a grave error,” he said almost robotically. “Now you shall face the wrath of Thanos.”

The two backed away, but Strange was faster. Debris rose around them, glimmering with magical energy. Tony didn’t even have a chance to _think_ of putting on his suit before debris was barreling towards him at breakneck speeds.

“Mr. Stark! Watch out!”

Peter crashed into him, shielding him with his own body as the rubble smashed into them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You didn't think they'd get away with it _that_ easily, did you?


	16. Psyche

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some wounds may never heal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter. It does me great happiness. Please lets my boys be happy.
> 
>  
> 
> Also, there are a lot of references in this chapter. There's been several before, but there's two in particular in this chapter that put a smile on my face.  
> Well, one of them makes me sad, but the other one...it's just funny.

He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t see. He was pinned. None of that mattered.

Peter.

Oh God, Peter.

He fought back panic. The kid sprawled over him, not moving. He couldn’t lose him again. Not again. Please no. Not again.

“Pete?” he whispered. “Pete come on. Wake up. This is no time for naps, kid.” He couldn’t move. He couldn’t tell if the kid was okay.

And he needed him to be okay.

Hysteria was taking over. “Kid, I can’t move. I need you to wake up. Please.” His voice cracked towards the end. He couldn’t take this. He’d already lost him once. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t.

Why couldn’t _he_ have been the one to try and protect the kid? Why did he always let people he cared about get hurt? Why couldn’t he save anyone? Why had he hesitated at all?

And now Peter was hurt. Maybe even dead.

No. No. He couldn’t be dead. He couldn’t handle it if he let the kid die. Not again. _Never_ again.

“Please,” he pleaded. He could feel the tears running down his cheeks again. “Please wake up, kid.”

Peter didn’t move.

So _he_ didn’t move.

He couldn’t.

He couldn’t do _anything_.

No. He couldn’t just lay there. He had to try _something_. He couldn’t give up on Peter _that_ easily.

And he was _Tony Stark_! _Iron Man_! He had a suit!

He just hoped Peter being on top of him didn’t interfere with anything.

With a simple thought, he activated the suit, shuddering as it formed. The tingling sensation of billions of tiny robots building themselves around him was something he still needed to get used to. The new armor was made with nanotech, just like the one he’d had the last time he fought with Thanos. And using the research Shuri had graciously allowed him to look through, he now wore a wristband instead of needing a whole shirt to hold it all together.

Repulsors online? Check. Power levels stable? Check. Sensors online? Check. He scanned Peter, breathing a sigh when they came up positive.

Peter was alive. Concussed, but alive. He was just unconscious.

Now, to get them free.

Sensors indicated that Strange had moved on, leaving them for dead. Good. That meant he could escape and get Peter to safety without being immediately noticed.

He couldn’t believe how much of an _idiot_ he was! He’d spent so much time pacing and double-checking and worrying about things that he’d forgotten to leave Strange with a psionic scrambler! Even if he was in astral form, it would’ve helped him once he’d returned to his body and attached it.

But now he had to deal with the consequences. Hopefully no one had been too hurt because of them.

He prepared to fire his repulsors, but stopped short when a groan sounded above him. “M-Mr. Stark?”

He felt Peter shift slightly, raising his head a bit. “You’re okay, kid, just hold still.”

“‘M s-sorry, sir. J-just wanted…”

“You did good, Pete. I’ll get us out of here.” A thought struck him. “Actually…,” he grunted. “Once I can move my arm, I want you to put the scrambler I hand you behind your ear. It’ll keep the telepath chick from possessing you like Strange.”

“T-telepath?”

“Yeah. Just let me handle this, okay?” He blasted whatever was pinning his arm down with a low-power burst. Some of the rocks trembled slightly, but thankfully nothing fell and crushed the two of them. He reached for his pocket, commanding the armor to open up a hole so he could retrieve the scrambler. “Here.”

Peter’s arm flailed a bit before he found his hand. Then, for once, he did what he was told. With the light from his armor, Tony could see the haggard expression on the kid’s face. His sensors indicated that Peter’s adrenaline levels and heart rate were incredibly high. Then again, so were his. High enough that his armor was giving him suggestions on how to lower them.

“G-got it,” Peter murmured, his head sinking back down onto Tony’s chest.

It hurt him to see the kid so... _crushed_. Usually he would be thrilled for a chance to fight with the Avengers, regardless of whether or not he was in any shape to do so. But now?

The look of defeat on his face fueled Tony with rage.

Thanos was going to pay for this.

But first, he had to get them out.

He wrapped his arm around the boy. “Put your mask on, kid. I don’t want you breathing any dust I stir up.”

The word ‘dust’ made Peter flinch, but once again, he did what he was told. Silently.

As much as it hurt him, he couldn’t dwell on it right now. They needed to get out.

He freed his other hand, then blasted the debris overhead. Peter clung tightly to him while he piloted them away, setting down behind the wreckage of an old building.

The other Avengers were battling Strange and the Guardians, who appeared to also be possessed. But Tony didn’t care about them. He cared about Thanos, who was punching his way through the line of _his friends_. The Infinity Gauntlet was nowhere to be seen, and the Soul Stone was no longer secured inside the Souleater.

He hated to think where they’d gone. Hopefully Hope and Scott had managed to escape with them.

He turned back to Peter. “You stay here, okay? I’ll be back for you.”

The boy looked up at him, his mask disappearing from his face. Tears lined his cheeks. “I can’t do this, Mr. Stark,” he whispered. “I’m not like you. I-I just wanna go home. I can’t d-do this anymore.”

Shit.

“Pete, you’re one of the strongest people I know,” he said carefully. He wasn’t prepared to deal with this. And his friends needed him. “You’ve done everything you can. I promise, everything will be okay soon.”

“I-I _died_!” Peter sobbed. “ _None of this_ is okay!”

An explosion sounded in the distance. They needed his help but...so did Peter. He crouched down in front of him, letting his facemask retract. “Look at me.”

The boy looked up at him, blinking away tears. Tony knew he could see the tear streaks on his own face, as well as the fear he could so easily hide behind the mask. “You say you’re not ‘like me’, kid?” He asked, putting his hand on Peter’s shoulder. “I’m just as scared as you are, and that’s okay. Hell, I still get nightmares about _New York_. That was, what, eight years ago?”

“Six...”

“Whatever. It was a long time ago, but I still freak out about it.” He gestured to himself. “I keep building new suits so I can protect people I care about, because I’m _always paranoid_ that _something_ will happen. It’s why I made _Ultron_ , and we all know how that went.

“The point is, _I_ get scared, too. And that’s okay. It means you’re _human_.” He took a breath. This was harder than he’d thought it would be. “You’re a _hero_ , Peter, not just some random kid from Queens. Sometimes, bad things happen to heroes. It’s how we deal with it that matters.” He figured it was best not to add that he dealt with things poorly. No point in freaking him out more.

Peter sniffled and stared at the ground. “I...I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to sleep again…”

Tony smiled sadly. He knew that feeling all too well. “You’ll get past it. Trust me.” His sensors beeped at him, letting him know that someone was down. He was afraid to look and see who it was. “I have to go help, okay?’

But Peter clung to him. “Don’t go. Stark, please, don’t go. Don’t go.”

Tony frowned. He couldn’t leave the kid like this. “If I could go back and change things, I would, but I can’t. I can’t fix what Thanos did to you—to _any_ of us. But I can make him pay.” God, he just wanted to stay here and hide. But that wasn’t what a hero would do. And dammit, he was a _hero_.

He pulled away, brushing tears from the boy’s cheeks. “I love you like my own son, Pete. And no one hurts my family and gets away with it.”

There he said it.

He surprised even himself sometimes.

Another beep told him someone else was down. “I have to go, kid,” he said, standing up. “But I’ll be back. I promise.” His mask slipped on. “Stay here.”

He fired up his repulsors, leaving Peter behind. Hopefully he would listen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My heart~
> 
> Now let Round 2 against Thanos commence.


	17. Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything rides on the outcome of one final battle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were _way_ too many characters to keep track of, here.
> 
> Also, I figured it was worth pointing out what Thanos could've done differently. Obviously he's insane and wouldn't care one way or another, but I feel like it's still kind of important.
> 
> And I may or may not have referenced the first Avengers movie...

Captain Marvel and Nebula had fallen. Tony could see their broken bodies back behind Thanos and his minion. That didn’t settle well him Tony. He flicked on the com.

“Guys what the hell am I supposed to do with this thing!?” Scott Lang shouted.

“Shrink it to the Quantum Realm!” Hope screamed back.

“But we need the Time Stone!” Rocket snarled. “Otherwise Gamora’s dead and gone, and I’ll never hear the end of it!”

“Would somebody help us with Strange!?” Rhodey yelled. “He keeps turning my missiles into butterflies!”

“No!” Thor bellowed. “We must focus our attack on Thanos!”

So the battle was going great.

“Avengers,” Tony said, finally coming into view, “you miss me?”

“Stark!” Clint shouted, letting an arrow fly towards Quill, who dipped out of the way just before it exploded. He dropped to the ground, but got back up in a flash and charged Wong. “Where the hell have you been?”

“Strange trapped us under some debris. Took a bit longer than I anticipated.” He landed next to the bowman and handed him a few scramblers. “Hit them with these. Should disrupt the mind control.”

“Got it.”

Tony flew off before Clint could make the first shot. He didn’t need to watch to know that Agent Hawkeye would live up to his name. “Where’s Banner?” he asked.

A small alarm went off inside his suit. He landed next to Steve. “Guess Thanos got to him already.”

An angry roar echoed over the wasteland. “Sounds like it.”

“Guess the Hulk finally decided to have Round 2.”

The giant green monster charged Thanos, his trademark rage glowing in his eyes. The purple alien merely smirked before taking the hit head-on. “Seems that way,” Steve muttered, popping his com out. “Is the kid safe?” he asked.

Tony shut his com off. “For now. Traumatized and concussed, but once this is over, hopefully he’ll be alright.”

“I hope so, too.”

They both turned their coms back on. “Status report,” Steve demanded.

Scott gave out a yelp. “Got the Gauntlet, but Muscles here won’t leave us alone!”

An arrow flew past Tony and Steve. “Got him,” Clint said. The huge gray alien, dropped, clutching his head. “You two alright?”

Hope grunted. “Barely.”

“Yeah, watch it next time. He almost fell on top of us.”

Clint shrugged and shot at the bug lady.

Another beep. Rocket was down. All this effort for just two villains? “How are they holding us all off?” Tony asked. “We should’ve dogpiled them by now!”

Natasha slid up next to them. “We tried,” she spat. “But Strange is protecting them with some kind of energy field. It took out the entire Iron Legion. We can’t get close to Supergiant, and Thanos is his own problem. Plus, the doctor keeps portalling around. We can’t catch him.”

Any other time he might’ve lamented losing however many hundreds of millions of dollars went into those suits, but his sensors beeped again. “Now we’ve lost Rhodey, too?” He glanced through the data streaming in front of his face. “And Wong!?”

Steve grimaced. “They were teaming against Strange.”

Thor lumbered up beside them, electricity crackling across his chest. “It is only our original team and the two insect humans. I do not like this.”

Thanos’s laugh rippled through the air. “You should have left it all alone,” he bellowed, tossing a barely conscious Hulk to the side. “I was finished with this senseless violence, but you’ve destroyed my life’s work.”

“News flash, Ugly,” Tony snarled. Just _seeing_ the villain again made his blood boil. “We’re _Avengers_. We don’t just sit and play dead when we lose.”

“It’s a shame, Stark. I thought you of all people would understand.”

He clenched his fists. “I _understand_ that you think _genocide_ is a solution. But with all that power, you could’ve just increased the amount of resources in the universe so that it _could_ sustain the population.”

Thanos shook his head. “And the population would continue to grow until it consumed those resources.”

Tony shook with rage. His suit rippled, forming sharp blades instead of his normal armor. Who did Thanos think he was, taking everything away from people? Murdering innocent lives? Hurting the people he cared about? “And genocide is supposed to keep it from growing!?”

Thanos shook his head. “Perhaps you are duller than I was lead to believe.” He waved to the alien floating behind him. “Let us finish this.”

The blue-skinned woman sneered. “May Death be merciless with your afterlife, meddlers.”

Tony smirked, easing into a defensive stance. “How many blue ladies did you adopt, Snappy Hands?”

Strange portalled in, blasting Tony with a sudden gust of wind before he could react.

He bared his teeth. This wasn't going to be harder than he’d thought. “Clint!” he cried. “Could use a hand!”

The archer notched an arrow, but Strange disappeared in cloud of mist. “Hard to hit him when he keeps doing that!”

Steve held up his shield. “We need to stop him somehow.”

Tony scanned the area for the doctor. “You’re supposed to be Captain _America_ , Steve. Not Captain _Obvious_.”

“Oh shit! Shit! Guys! Help!” The cry cut off abruptly.

Steve whipped his head around. “Scott!? Scott where are you!?”

The Ant-man sized up, stumbling around. Blood dribbled from his lip. “Duplicated my suit. Got the Gauntlet.” He collapsed, clutching a nasty wound in his side.

Hope appeared at his side. “Scott!? Scott!”

Tony’s heart sank. Panic tore at his mind. This couldn’t be happening. He had to fix this somehow. But _how_?

Thor hefted his axe. “We cannot let Thanos take back the Gauntlet. We must take it back at all costs.”

His sensors indicated a massive mess of energy off to his left. He shot a repulsor at it, praying that it was the Gauntlet. Strange grunted, reappearing as he took the hit to the chest. The Gauntlet was firmly clutched in his arms.

Thor wasted no time, summoning the biggest lightning storm Tony had ever seen and channeling it into the man. Strange shrieked, his muscles convulsing. Before anyone else could react, the god stomped forward and smashed his axe straight into the Gauntlet itself, obliterating it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the endgame, now.  
> What will our heroes do?


	18. Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time claims all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard to write, but I'm extremely proud of it.

Strange’s cold, lifeless eyes stared at Tony. The image of the man’s burned flesh forever seared itself into his brain, but he couldn’t dwell on it.

The Gauntlet shattered, the shockwave knocking him off his feet. Infinity Stones glimmered in the faded sunlight of Titan, scattering in all directions.

Oh God.

Their only way out of this nightmare.

The green Time Stone glinted in his eyes. Everything seemed to slow. He couldn’t risk Thanos getting these things. He had to prevent it. He had to fix it before it ever happened.

Even if it killed him.

Because it wasn’t about him. It was about Pepper. And Peter. And Steve, Bruce, Rhodey. It was about everyone else. The universe could live on without him. There would always be people to stop the bad guys. But he, in this moment, could ensure that the universe would still exist for those heroes.

He lunged for the Stone.

“Tony no!”

But he had to.

His hand closed around the Time Stone.

Everything exploded.

What had he just done?

He was vaguely aware of his body falling to the ground, but his mind was somewhere else entirely. He could see _everything_. Every _time_ , every _place_ , every _possibility_. _Everything_.

He and Pepper getting married. Him passing on his company to Peter. His parents helping him build a new Iron Man suit. Clint in a circus. Sokovia falling and destroying the planet. Loki wiping out the universe. Peter doing some edgy emo dance. Thanos utilizing his power for good.

Every possible outcome of every single scenario.

So much.

_Too_ much.

Oh God.

He could feel himself ripping apart at the seams. There was too much. The Stone made him see everything. Every possibility, no matter how ridiculous. It existed somewhere. He was nothing. Time possessed everything. Everything faded in time. Time would destroy all.

Even Tony Stark.

He screamed, the images tearing him to shreds.

Someone grasped onto him, their screams echoing his own. “Not losing you today, soldier!”

Another took hold. “I do not know if this will help, but I will not let my brother in arms fall!”

Another. “Hang on, Stark!”

“We’ve got you!”

A massive green hand joined the swirling mass of energy. “Puny smart man won’t die today!”

He could vaguely make out the outline of Thanos through the endless timelines. Though he couldn’t be sure which expression he actually held. “This is impossible!” a thousand versions cried.

“Incredible!”

“Preposterous!”

“Fascinating!”

“Amazing!”

He clenched his teeth. Some small portion of his fractured mind told him that he had to end this. He had to stop this. _Now_.

_But time means nothing when you become time itself,_ a piece of him said.

_But this body won’t hold together forever._

_Have to end this._

_Have to stop Thanos._

_Have to ensure that none of this ever happens again._

_Have to protect them._

_Have to be a hero._

He raised the arm holding the Stone. He pointed at Thanos.

_This. Ends. Now._

Energy streamed from the Stone, burning through his hand. But it burned Thanos more. The Mad Titan screamed, his form aging into oblivion. Dry bones clattered to the ground, only to be picked up by the storm.

_What a pointless end to a villain like him._

He gasped for air. Nothing had ever hurt like this before. It was like he was feeling all the pain he’d ever endured all at once.

He was dying.

But strangely enough, he found that he didn’t care; time took everything eventually. He understood that now. His left arm was long gone, torn apart by battles he would now never see. And yet he saw all of them. Yet he could still feel where it should be—still feel the pain it took on.

He wasn’t afraid to die. He could handle death. And his best friends were right there with him. He knew they could see it too. He knew they weren’t afraid, either. They were seeing the realities where all their dreams had come true. Natasha as a mother. Bruce no longer afraid of himself. Clint retired and free. Thor as the king of Asgard, his brother ruling by his side. Steve with all his friends, both past and present, alive, happy, and together.

And himself?

He saw himself dancing with Pepper, no longer afraid of the future and what horrors it may bring. No fear. No anxiety. And Peter was there, too. Not afraid. Not hurt. Not worried. Alive and well. Just like he deserved.

Of course, he knew it wouldn’t happen, as beautiful as that scene was. He wouldn’t be making it home. Pepper was gone. Soon, he would be, too.

But at the very least, he could cherish this moment.

Finally at peace.

“Mr. Stark!”

What? Something was wrong. But he couldn’t see through the haze of visions. Someone had called him? His name? But where? When?

“Don’t leave me! Please!”

A hand clasped over what remained of his own. “I won’t let you do this! We can find another way!”

Peter?

Visions flashed through his addled mind. Peter falling to his feet in the ruins of Titan, defeated and sobbing, begging him to come back. Peter picking his way through the rubble, taking Quill’s ship back to Earth, depressed and alone. Peter not speaking, not going home, not doing anything at all. Peter _dying_. _Alone_.

He’d practically claimed this boy as his own son. He couldn’t do this to him. But what choice did he have? Time claimed all.

The other Avengers screamed, the collective pain of holding on—of trying to control the power—killing them. And him, too. And Peter.

He couldn’t do this to Peter.

But he couldn’t let the boy kill himself trying to save them, either.

He kicked Peter away, letting the power he’d shared flow back through the rest of them. “Mr. Stark no! I can help!”

He focused in on a particular day, one that all the other Avengers would remember as well. One that had led to many bad choices and circumstances down the road. One that he could go back to and fix all this. He sensed the others seeing it as well. They were in agreement.

“Pete,” he wheezed. His voice sounded so wrong. Like a blend of his past and future selves all speaking at once. “I’ll see you soon.”

“No wait—!”

But his cries were lost to the edges of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter~


	19. Reparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The scars of yesterday may never fade, but tomorrow looks brighter than it ever did before.

They stood outside of Strucker’s HYDRA facility in the middle of Sokovia, three years before Thanos attacked. None of them fully remembered what they’d seen, but they remembered the feelings all too well. And they remembered the future that, now, would never happen.

Tony stumbled out of his armor, his breath coming in gasps. He fell to his knees and stared at his hand. Imprinted forever on his palm was a circular scar where he’d held the Time Stone. If he tilted it just right, it glimmered dull green in the soft winter sun. Thin scars laced his arms, also faintly green-colored. He had a feeling the scars stretched across his entire body.

But who cared?

He was alive. Alive in a time before everything went horribly wrong.

“Tony?” Steve’s voice.

He took another frigid breath, the panic slowly subsiding. “I’m alright.”

He wasn’t. Everything hurt. He felt like he’d just been through a blender and then pieced back together by some five year-old with a bottle of glue and some tape.

But he was alive. And so was everyone else. And everything was going to be alright.

“You look terrible.”

He looked up at the soldier. His friend. “You’re not looking too hot yourself.”

It was true. They all bore the scars of the Time Stone—some less than others, but everyone did. And everyone looked exhausted. “Maybe not, but I want you to sit this out, okay?”

“Sit out and let you have all the fun, Rogers?” he snorted. “Yeah right.”

“Tony, I could knock you over with my finger right now. Let the rest of us handle things.”

Clint smirked. “Yeah, Stark. You can’t hog _all_ the glory today.”

“To be fair, ‘today’ and the ‘the day that never happened where we all held the Time Stone together’ are two completely different days.”

His smile softened. “Yeah, well. It’s the least we can do.”

Tony shook his head, finally standing and making his way back into his armor. “I wasn’t the only one who saved the universe, Clint. We all did.”

And it felt incredible. Painful, but incredible. He could barely believe they were all together again. A team. More than that, a family.

A family he knew he could trust.

“Sir, what are you alright?” a calm voice asked once the facemask had closed.

He nearly jumped back out of his suit. “ _Shit_!”

“Language.”

Tony took another shaky breath. He couldn’t believe he’d forgotten about Jarvis. “Haha, very funny, _Captain_.”

Steve grinned. “Just slipped out.”

Thor ran a hand through his hair. “Ah. It is good to have this back,” he mused. “And Mjolnir as well!” Then he stopped and thought for a moment. “Wait this was before Ragnarok, which means…”

“Dealt with your crazy sister before, Thor,” the Hulk grunted. “We can do it again.”

“I care little of Hela, but this means that my father, Odin, is still alive. As is Loki.”

The Hulk shrugged, the movement rippling across his entire body. “Can still deal with it.”

The pair laughed. “Indeed, my large green friend.”

“So what do we do now?” Natasha interrupted. “We still need to take down this base, and the twins probably don’t remember us.”

Clint notched an arrow and took aim at what appeared to be nothing. “If my memory serves me correctly…” He let it fly. A voice cried out in surprise. “Yup. Still got it.” He meandered over to a now-netted, silver-haired boy. “How’s it goin’, Pietro?”

The teenager stopped struggling. “Wh- How did you…?”

“What? Didn’t see that one coming?” He leaned down and tugged the net off. “Show some respect, man. I named my kid after you.” Then he looked up in surprise, his face elated. “My kids are alive again! This might be one of the best days of my life!”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “Don’t be too quick to call it that, Barton. And I thought you named him after Natasha. Sort of.”

“I did. Nathaniel Pietro Barton.”

He took the boy aside and started explaining things to him. He seemed surprisingly willing to listen. Maybe with his connection to the Mind Stone, he knew that Clint was telling the truth. Hopefully Wanda would respond similarly. Of course, there was still the matter of the Stones themselves—destroying them. And Vision, he supposed. But he didn’t want to worry about those things right now. There were things he needed to do. Someone he needed to see.

“If you guys are sure you can handle Strucker, then I’m headed home.”

Steve shot him a thumbs up. “Tell her I said ‘hello’.”

 

“Tony? I thought you were in Sokovia.”

Holy shit he wasn’t prepared. She was so beautiful and perfect and wonderful. He didn’t deserve this chance. The hallucinations still haunted the back of his mind, but this was real. _She_ was real.

He released the suit, making a mental note to recreate the one he’d made in Wakanda later. That thing hadn’t gotten to shine as much as he’d hoped.

“Tony? Where did all those scars come from? What happened?”

“Pepper,” he said, his voice cracking, “you’re never gonna believe the week I’ve had.”

“You saw me this morning.”

He walked towards her—towards the goddess he didn’t deserve—and pulled her close, breathing in her scent. He wanted to stay like that forever. He wanted to be with _her_ forever. Who cared if time eventually claimed him? At the very least, he would have his love. His _world_.

She may not understand yet, but for now, he was content to just hold her. To have her back. To have her _alive_.

It was all he ever dreamed of.

 

It’d taken a few hours to explain everything, and he’d broken down more times than he cared to count. But she understood, and she still loved him. He couldn’t be more happy.

He fingered the ring in his pocket. The same ring that Happy had apparently been carrying around since 2008. Crazy guy. He reminded himself to give the man a raise. And an extra week of vacation. Not that he’d take it, but it was the thought that counted.

He was going to get things right this time. He wasn’t going to propose at a press conference that was supposed to be for something else. It was going to be right. Romantic. No prying eyes.

“Pardon me, sir, but there’s someone at the door for you.”

And apparently it would have to wait.

“Who is it, Jarvis?” He still wasn’t used to the A.I. being back. That voice belonged to Vision, not his computer. He had Friday for that. Or at least, he _used_ to. Sort of. He still didn’t know for sure how to bring the android back without the Mind Stone, so until he could figure it out, he’d hang onto Jarvis and keep Friday in reserve. Once he invented her again, of course.

“I’m not sure, sir, but he insists on seeing you.”

“Visual, please.”

A holoprojector appeared in front of him. Yeesh, those things were old. He’d have to replace them later. But the image on it was all that mattered.

Sure, they were three years earlier, but he’d know that face anywhere.

“Let him in, Jarvis. Send him up.”

The boy on the video stared in surprise as the door opened. “He will be up shortly,” Jarvis said. “Though I am still uncertain of his intentions.”

He watched the elevator number rise. “I know exactly what he wants.”

The elevator dinged. Out stepped a 14 year-old kid who timidly looked around before finally making eye contact.

“H-hey, Mr. Stark.”

A wide grin spread across Tony’s face. “Well if it isn’t our friendly neighborhood Spiderman,” he laughed, wrapping his arm around Peter’s shoulders and guiding him to one of the couches. “Shouldn’t you be in school?”

The kid laughed, rubbing one of his arms. Like the Avengers, it was laced with thin green scars. “K-kinda freaked out in the middle of class. No one saw the scars but…”

“But you remember.”

“Yeah.”

“Well. I’m glad.” He patted the kid on the back. “Means I don’t have to give you Superhero 101 again.”

“Tony, who’s this?”

The boy nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of Pepper’s voice.

Tony turned to face his girlfriend. Hard to believe they’d been demoted back that. But he would fix that soon. Once Peter went home. “This is Peter Parker,” he said. “He remembers what happened, too.”

She raised an eyebrow. “How old are you?”

“Sevent—” The kid’s face turned red. “Erm...I guess I’m thirteen again.” He groaned. “This sucks.”

Tony laughed. “Yeah. Something we’ll just have to get used to.”

Peter rubbed his scarred arm. “Can’t believe I didn’t notice you, Ms. Potts,” he muttered. “Forgot what it was like without Spidey Sense. How do you people live?”

“You don’t have your powers yet?”

“Didn’t get them until November.” He dropped his head into his hands. “God, I’m an eighth-grader again. This is horrible.”

He had to remind himself that Peter’s life would pretty much stay the same as it had the last time through, even if the Avengers had something completely different going on. “Maybe you can skip straight to your senior year instead of going back through the other three.”

“No, because if I still wanna be Spiderman, then I have to go on that field trip as a freshman.”

“Which begs the question: do you still want to be Spiderman?”

The boy bit his lip. “I do, but...after everything that happened I don’t...I don’t know how much good I’ll be...”

Tony met his eyes. “Peter, powers don’t make someone a hero. I mean, just look at _me_. I don’t care how old you are, or how strong you are, you’re still a hero. We wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.”

The kid smiled softly, blushing. He must not have been expecting the praise. “What do you mean ‘we wouldn’t be here’?”

“If you hadn’t jumped in when you did, we wouldn’t have turned back time.” He leaned back on the couch. “I don’t really remember what I saw, but I remember that we were all fine with dying. But when you shared the energy, all I saw was you hurt…a-and alone. I couldn’t do that to you. So we turned it back here. Before Sokovia, before our fight. Before any of that.”

Peter ran a hand through his hair. “This is insane.”

Pepper smirked. “As someone who wasn’t even there and who saw Tony perfectly fine this morning, I can almost guarantee that this has been crazier for me.”

“Right. Yeah.”

Tony glanced at his watch. “Well kid, I think your school’s out by now, so why don’t I take you home.”

“I um...that’s okay, Mr. Stark. I can walk.”

Tony narrowed his eyes. “Kid you’re in the middle of Manhattan. You live in Queens. Besides, you came here looking for me, so the least I can do is get you back.” He hopped up from the couch and extended his hand for Peter. “Come on.”

The boy cautiously took his hand. “Thanks, Mr. Stark.”

“Call me Tony, Peter.”

 

Tony wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but it was not this random guy he’d never seen before opening the door to the Parker’s apartment. He could’ve sworn that May and Peter lived alone, so who—?

“Uncle Ben!?” Peter cried, his eyes lighting up. He rushed to hug the man, whose eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“Peter, where’ve you been? And who…?” The man’s eyes trailed slowly to Tony’s face. “Is that who I think it is?”

Tony rubbed his arm, hoping Peter would take charge. But judging by the tears on the kid’s face, it looked like he was going to have to be the adult. Great. “Mr. Parker,” he grunted, feeling entirely too awkward. He had no idea who this guy was, and Peter had never even mentioned him before, which was impressive since he seemed pretty important. “It seems we have a lot to talk about.”

God, this was weird.

The man looked at Tony like he was an alien. With the scars, maybe he kind of looked like one, too. “Yeah…” He opened the door slightly and walked back inside as best he could with Peter hanging on him like that. At least the kid got the picture after a few steps and let go.

Then Peter grabbed Tony’s hand and led him in, completely unaware of just how awkward all of this was. Under different circumstances, it might’ve been a cute gesture. “I didn’t know you had an uncle, Pete,” he murmured as ‘Uncle Ben’ rounded the corner, presumably to get May.

Peter stopped moving for a moment, still holding tight to Tony’s hand. He was shaking and holding back more tears. “By the time we met, I didn’t.”

So Peter had lost this man sometime during this year.

Somehow, that hurt Tony a lot more than he felt it should.

Then again, he’d basically claimed Peter as his own at this point, so he supposed he was emotionally involved now.

May Parker stepped into the room, eyes wide in surprise at her nephew holding the hand of a multibillionaire genius superhero.

There was absolutely no way he was ever going to hear the end of this.

“Mrs. Parker,” he said, clearing his throat and doing his best to make this less awkward. It wasn’t working. “Your um...your nephew sort of showed up at my tower, so I thought I’d...bring him home.”

Yep. There was no coming back from this.

She stared at him for a moment before finally speaking. “I’m not sure if I’m more disturbed or impressed.”

Ben returned behind his wife. “Peter, what _exactly_ did you do that got _Tony Stark_ to bring you home?”

Peter finally released his hand. Thank _God_. “It’s kind of a long story, so we should probably sit down.”

Tony eased down on the couch next to the boy, messing with the ring in his pocket again. He didn’t _want_ to wait for the proposal, but he was going to have to. Especially if he still wanted to still see Peter after explaining what the hell happened.

This was going to take a while.

But Tony didn’t mind too much. He had everything he could’ve asked for and more. The team was back together, having forgiven the mistakes that had now never happened, and never _would_ happen. More importantly, he had Pepper back, and dammit, he was going to marry her sooner rather than later. He wasn’t going to wait anymore. He’d done that long enough. And he had Peter back, too. With his uncle alive again, no less. Who cared whether or not he had superpowers?

He was still a hero, even without them.

Peter had once told him that he wanted to be like him. He’d told him to be better, and now, looking at the kid he’d done his best to mentor, despite all of his own failures and shortcomings, he couldn’t help but be proud. They may never fully heal from the events in the other timeline, but they could always work to fix their mistakes, time travel or no. Tony wasn’t going to let any more opportunities pass him by. He was going to be better than himself—better than he ever thought he could be. Because it wasn’t about him; it was about the people he cared about. The people he loved.

And that put a smile on his face.

He just had to get through the explanations, first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so that's the end of this wild ride! I don't know how I wrote it as fast as I did, but somehow, I did. Also I somehow managed to end on a really good note which, if you've ever read any of my stories before, you know doesn't really happen.  
> Ever.
> 
> But it's been really fun to write something like this again. The first Avengers that got me into writing in the first place, and I still have the first fic I wrote somewhere. (May it never see the light of day again.) It only makes sense that I'd fall for Infinity War as hopelessly as I did.  
> Now, though, I'm going to focus on my original writing. (You can follow me on [Tumblr](https://mslynnwrites.tumblr.com) to stay updated on it.) Because as much as I love writing fanfiction and putting my favorite characters in different situations, I'm still hopelessly in love with my original ideas. And I want to be a published author someday so...kinda have to write the book...
> 
> Anyways, thanks for enjoying the fic. I'm glad that so many people have.  
> :D


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